This is the Continuation of The Oregon Budsman Treatment Journal now as The Cannabis Reality Blog – Watch Cannabis Reality
11-2-16 – I will be doing this as the blog in about 3 weeks following completion of my RSO. I will probably go back and re-read the passages and do an article about that and medical treatment with cannabis.
Yesterday the NFL Network reran the first round of every draft since 2010, and it was fascinating to watch. You got to see the instant analysis of every pick in the moment from the future perspective, especially when you knew that prospect was now a bust.
Last year the #1 overall pick in the draft was quarterback Jared Goff, taken by the (once again) Los(t) Angeles Rams after giving up a boatload of picks to move up to #1.
While no one thought he was going to be Troy Aikman, the analysis on draft night of Goff was that he could play right away, and he had all the tools necessary to succeed.
That, obviously, is not what happened. While the Rams have severe issues on offense (such as no offensive line), Goff was not ready to start, and struggled mightily. Now, that is not unusual for a
rookie, and Goff may well become an elite quarterback in time—or he may be a dismal bust like Bob Griffin (and *I* called that one before he was drafted).
Right now, however, he doesn’t look so good, and some people in the sports world have started referring to him as “Jared Goof.” Ouch.
Think about that: in one year he went from the #1 overall pick in the draft, a “promising prospect” to merely “Jared Goof.” Now he may well drop the additional “o” by this time next year and be known as Jared Goff, ascending talent, but right now he gets the goof label. Just goes to show you how fleeting glory is, and how hard it is to stay on top.
What I learned a long time ago about success is this: it is only temporary, even fleeting, and it has to be achieved again and again and again. You don’t work hard and achieve everlasting success. You work hard, achieve temporary success, fail a lot again, work hard for more temporary success, and let the pattern repeat. Along the way you save from your temporary successes instead of squandering them, and in time you will have enough built up to last you for a long time. But your successes will never last in and of themselves.
Strangely, that is for the best. Those who luck into windfall profits never acquire the skills to profit again, nor do they know how to mentally deal with adversity. When you are constantly fighting to achieve, you learn the skills of mental toughness, you hone your instincts, you live by your wits, and you never rest on your laurels.
This is the real reward of constantly struggling to achieve the next temporary success. It is the skill set that lets you live well in this world while others are constantly frustrated by it. Yes, you
can (and will) go from the #1 pick to the #1 goof, but if you acquire this skill set, you can get back to #1, not bothered at all knowing you will be the goof once again soon enough. You will, however,
eventually be the rich goof, and that is not a bad place to be.
11-12-16 12:00 PM PST
I’ll write this later – What Happened With That Election?
11-2-16 1:19 PDT
I am working more on financing and expansion of the ticketing business along with the promotional company which will expand everything. I have a friend of mine attempting to get down here, she’s in Alaska now so it is down here. Worked with her previously and she is great at sales. She sent me several of her pictures and very pretty so she would present very well. My problem is she is very pretty and presents very well to me. LOL
I haven’t taken any cannabis medication since yesterday at 3 AM. This journal has been a record of notes during the time of treatment. I will be weaning myself down over the next three weeks. I will be glad to finish the treatment and stop this Journal. Maybe I should put this journal back as private because I am going effect of criticism from people I knew in Texas. Then I think what is my purpose of this and it’s public nature. What is my target market? What is it I am trying to accomplish?
I moved here from Texas a year ago to be involved in the legal cannabis industry. This is my market and this is my blog directed to my target market here in Portland.
11-1-16 2:26 PDT
I have about 10 more days of this heavy THC treatment left. At that time I will change the format of this blog from the Journal as here to more of an article format. I went back and read some of this during the day when my therapeutic levels are lowest. Some of this is not very entertaining and somewhat strange. That said I start to doubt if I should have this available to read.
If we start to get a following for the series the blog will inevitably be followed and critiqued. I am being critical of my work. Everyone likes to hear and get positive reinforcement, me included. When someone doesn’t get the positive feedback, the void will be filled with negatives and rejection. Self doubt and lack of confidence. It is a constant struggle to keep on track moving ahead. That is one of the tasks an entrepreneur must tackle daily.
Yesterday was a good day as I did accomplish tasks. Then I invalidate myself. I question if I’m really doing anything or just fantasizing accomplishments. This particularly in this esoteric land of deal making of ideas. I am living in this fantasy world that I am mocking up into reality. The invalidation changes the reality back towards fantasy. My favorite saying on that is “Talk is cheap, it takes money to ride the train.” WTF?
The offer to sit on the National Policy Committee of NCIA or even chair it to me appears to be a valuable asset. The equivalent or actual position of lobbyist. That would also render credibility for me in this industry. This could be advantageous for our businesses. Then I think is that real or am I imagining it to be real?
I will stay on a maintenance dose. Surprisingly, I believe his cannabis treatment is working with minimal physical side effects. Actually one of the side effects is that I have discontinued all blood pressure meds. I wasn’t taking cannabis for that but rather was an added advantage. And I just took my BP so was not as controlled as desired, 136/86, but okay. I do believe that one of the negative side effects of this is my behavior. Personally I don’t think I’ve behaved inappropriately but have been definitely guilty of inappropriate disclosures.
I have been on cannabis treatment 19 months now originally for prostate cancer that runs in my family. Subsequently I have been treated for PTSD. Both I know have improved. The current round of RSO treatment was 93 grams over 90 days. In that span I have consumed in THC the equivalent as if I had smoked 80 joints every day with someone else.
I did this because I want to believe in the positive effects of the plant. I thought if I am going to promote this plant and industry I must believe enough to “Drink the Kool-Aid”.
10-27-16 12:12 PDT
I really don’t know why I am writing this, I have no followers. I will admit I do feel self-conscious about writing a blog and putting all this out there so I’m really not promoting it. Maybe no one knows about my blog or the YouTube channel. I have no followers nor responders. I express my opinions about something and people get real interested or it appears they are interested. Then I step up the level of the presentation and lose their understanding. That’s when I get into these weird explanations I have concocted about the problem trying to be solved.
I say things like cancer is really these little “bugs” or energy cells that we take in that combine with all the toxins and carcinogens being produced that change the genetic structure and causes mutations. Or the ticket broker/coffee bistro solution I came up with for 280E and the reality TV project and how to implement it.
On the TV project we had a Meetup last night that 8 people signed up to finalize the cast and crew. I was the only one there. The videographer texted me and said he had to work his paid job but wanted to get together next Monday to proceed. Granted it rained last night (Portland) and I am way over in Gresham so if I didn’t live a half block away from the office I probably wouldn’t have come myself and it was my Meetup.
The PTSD has really messed with my confidence and willingness to proceed. Without the cannabis now I would probably be catatonic and stay in bed all day. As it is I am able to function well on the cannabis as medicine. I would like to have an objective caretaker/practitioner overseeing my treatment as I feel the results would be more attuned.
What I wanted to say today with this is Cannabis is Real Medicine. It is just not perfect yet. And what does that mean, just not perfect yet? Cannabis is a plant that has many great properties used for a slew of different things from food source, building materials, skin care and even therapeutics and pharmaceuticals. It has to be processed to really be useful. The only real use for raw cannabis is to smoke and get high. That is a great use, because it is far superior to ethanol.
To be useful it has to be extracted either by high heat and pressure or with some form of solvent, usually either CO2 or butane but alcohol works well too. The problem with this, particularly with whole plant cannabis you extract everything, including the waste products.
To put this in perspective consider the human body. When we take in nourishment whether in the form of solids or liquids, the food is processed by the body, nutrients are extracted and the residual waste products are collected and excreted from the lower abdomen. This is what is colloquially referred to as “Piss and Shit”.
Rick Simpson Oil, or RSO is a great medicine in its day, but it is unrefined. RSO looks and tastes terrible. I hate the stuff but take it as medicine because right now it is the best medicine for what I am treating. We are in the medieval times now with cannabis. Twenty years from now, if we haven’t all died from the current state of affairs in politics, terpenes will be understood along with the various cannabinoids. There will be specific regimens using pure cannabis extract, hopefully not just synthetics, for various ailments. Cannabis is Real Medicine. It is just not perfect yet.
3:30 PM PDT
Talked with 2 more investment/money people today which sounds all good but no check written. Then I put up the warning image to the right. I thought it was humorous and got me a laugh out of myself.
10-26-16 12:01 PDT
It is barely afternoon but I will post this here. I got an email today from my brother and it was funny – at least to me. It was mainly graphic with a lot of pictures of women with some showing bare breasts. They were very nice artsy photos. The subject line at the top of the email was “advice from one old guy to another.”
Quite frankly from all the publicity with Trump and him labeled rightly so being misogynistic, I thought I might have received this from the Don himself. However it was addressed from my brother, who is a staunch Republican and entrenched in voting for Trump. Really, he is a loyal Republican and will probably vote along a straight Republican ticket, so I knew who it was from already. He also is probably the most successful in our family having taken over the family business and building it into where it is today. He is a successful, Republican businessman.
The punch line of his email was: I’ve completely forgotten where I was going with this !
(This kind of shit happens when you get older).
Sorry for wasting your time !
It was funny to me and I thought it was appropriate considering the subject matter to put those last 3 lines below the picture of the well endowed beautiful woman he posted. Was it in poor taste, yes. To me? No. Was it offensive? Probably, but I wasn’t offended. I am probably numb to what most people would find offensive. That is from the years listening to mostly offensive and derogatory derisions directed towards me.
The inappropriate nature of the email did seem minor to me and didn’t even think about it except for the current rave on socially acceptable events. I wasn’t offended by his email, but the email was not about me, it was about these unidentified nude women. Would I be offended by a picture of me butt ass naked blasted over the internet? Probably, I think anyone would by that.
Now this was in a private email sent to me – well I did see 6 other CC’s but that’s beside the point, it was a private email to 7 people and not meant for public dissemination like those Trump videos were meant to be. Again I don’t like either one of these candidates.
My other brother is not as wealthy but he is a successful, well respected Democratic immigration attorney and restauranteur. I am not attempting to disparage either one of my brothers, because I love them both, but they are like oil and water when it comes to political beliefs and social concerns. They are both steadfast Catholics and attend mass every Sunday. They are both my brothers but different.
Was it wrong for my older brother to send that email as he did mean it as a joke, that is him. Is it wrong for someone to say the things Trump said about women, gays, different races? Some of the things he says and does are not very nice. That is him. Should he be president of the USA? He should be if he get the majority vote as if Clinton does. Winner takes all.
I have not met either one of the presidential candidates and can only judge their character by what the news media wishes to portray. What I have discerned is that neither one of them deserve to be president. But who am I to say.
Words are just that, words. If someone says something you don’t like you can get upset and argue with them or you can boycott them and leave. It’s up to you as that is your right.
10-24-16 1:37 PDT
I had an initial meeting with one of if not the major cannabis leaders in the area this morning. The meeting went well as I did a selfie recording for some of it. I also talked with someone at DOPE magazine about some type of joint venture. I put together another email template to send out following a meeting. I had another email template I was using previously as followup to meeting a prospective business associate. I was sending this out a few months ago when looking for crew:
We are interested in putting together a pilot for a reality series to hi-lite a new cannabis company in the Portland, Oregon area. It is to show what is involved in promoting the company and we will have guests from the local cannabis community promoting their products and services. Our company is www.mjconsultingservices.com 817-917-0219
I re-read that now and thought what is that crap. So this is the follow up email am sending now:
It was good speaking with you today regarding our separate operations. It does appear that there is some strong synergy between the two entities. I believe it would be mutually beneficial for us to form some type of alliance on a project together if this is of interest to you. At this point however, I do not know for sure if there is a fit there but as I said I believe there is.
MJ Consulting Services is basically a holding company for our varied interests. Our primary company in the Portland, Oregon area for revenue generation is the event ticket brokerage I have with my 2 business partners called CannaTixx. Right now we have 2 suites at the Moda Center along with other sets of tickets there and other venues across the country. That said, the entertainment aspects of CannaTixx and how concerts and cannabis are connected gives us a tremendous in road to market to. Our tagline for CannaTixx is “We Cater To The Cannabis Crowd.”
We are taking on a limited number of channel partners to expand the ticketing business to pair with retail cannabis operations. The primary reasoning is to increase traffic and profitability from additional sales of a product your competitors are not supplying, help mitigate the effects of IRS Section 280E and generate income from the managed ticket brokerage.
However, our main thrust in the cannabis industry is we are producing a reality television series centered around interviewing, recording and promotion of all the dispensaries/rec stores in the Portland/Vancouver area. Along with this we will shoot on location at concerts, sporting events and cannabis meeting such as yours at the Old Freeman Factory this next weekend here in Portland.
I have received much positive feedback from the cannabis community about the project so far with agreement about doing interviews. Of course that is free promotion now for them. One of my ticketing partners will visit the dispensaries to get signed releases and vett them as to question preparation and build rapport.
Right now we are looking for support in the way of finances and personnel. I have a Meetup scheduled this Wednesday at our office here in Gresham. I believe this project can and will be fun , exciting and profitable. It is being hosted by the group I founded PNWCIL. Here is the link for the Meetup on Wednesday – come join us and launch this.
Then my buddy Dave called me. You know who your friends are because they are he ones checking up on you to make sure you’re alive day to day. David said he thought he was getting $20 mill for his project which would be well deserved as it could play out to be a multi billion deal. He has had some unwarranted money issues because of trusting others. Anyways, I hope it comes through for him because of all his work in the industry it’s time he gets paid. So I thought would I be jealous if that comes through for him?
Jealousy is an undesirable human trait. I actually wish that everyone on the planet would mysteriously get $20 million dollars tomorrow. If the finance structure stays the same and everyone else get $20 million and I only get $10 million given to me or fronted to me to do a business deal I’ll be more than happy because I know what I could do with $10,000,000 in the current financial environment. The problem with that is the level of finances necessary to equate wealth or even stability would be skewed then. That would not solve anything as a cup of coffee would now probably cost $100K. So do I get jealous of others? No and Yes. I want everyone to succeed, grow and prosper. Let’s all succeed, grow and prosper together.
I cannot do this business successfully as I want to do it by myself. It is just not happening. I WANT and NEED this to take off. As it is now I am not doing anything of significance. Right now my business is a hobby. To be a business to support myself and others we NEED to expand and bring on more staff. That is what we NEED and what we WANT.
10-22-16 3:27 PDT
I seem to be making progress with my company(s) but it seems so slow. I had planned on giving up that reality television plan because even though got so much positive feedback, “talk is cheap it takes money to ride the train.” I don’t have enough capital to do this business and I don’t have any volunteers. I made a whole vblog about motivation and getting yourself and others motivated. If you can get someone to volunteer to help they are motivated. It is difficult to find employees that will volunteer to work and evidently that is what is perceived is a commission only sales position.
I supported myself well for years on commission only sales, but not everyone is broker of the month 2 out of every 3 months. I’m not trying to brag but I WAS, with emphasis on WAS, a very good salesperson. And it was all commission only. In sales, the people that earn the most are commission. I believe that others believe that also. I think it maybe now others don’t believe in themselves.
That said, I keep gravitating back to the reality television concept and the marketing aspects that represents. It seems clear to me more and more that integrating this now is my best course of action. The sheer fact that it will be a fun project is motivating in and of itself. This is the email I sent out to the 85 members we now have in PNWCIL:
We are finally getting some impetus for the television project. I am still without enough budget and/or volunteers for cast/crew/production and distribution but we have enough for right now. We are having a meetup on Wednesday night at the CannaTixx office.
This is going to be a fun project. We have 2 suites at the Moda Center and the Blazers are going to rock this year. Coupled with that we are on target to interview each and every dispensary/rec store in the Portland/Vancouver area by the end of next year.
Come join us if you’re in Portland next Wednesday http://tinyurl.com/hgvt6tr
I’ve been recording a lot of these selfies and have some content. Most everything is uploaded to YouTube but private. Someone want to help me?
10-20-16 1:09 PM PDT
Things are getting way better but I’m sill begging for coins. I’m starting to talk with money people again that actually understand my visions. I get excited particularly with what I consider stupidity if they can’t see it. I don’t get upset I just get excited I can’t convey my understanding of the potential to these people I’m dealing with.
10-19-16 2:57 PM PDT
I did some ticket biz today buying about $800 in tickets listed for $1500. Put the retail value of inventory at $58,378 which is barely sustainable if I don’t eat any tickets and subsequently sell all tickets. Traditionally $58K will produce about $15,000 in sales for 4 months and unless replenished the business is done. I had $59K when I moved to Portland last November, had built I up to $91K before Laura moved here. Is that a coincidence or a cause? Either way we really shouldn’t live together as we are not compatible any longer. I don’t hate her but I don’t want her around me. We are done and that is it. I think it is sad how relationships deteriorate and always for irrational reasons. The reasons always seem so significant at the time but later when looked at and after all the damage is done were so unimportant.
I am suspect now about the efficacy of the cannabis oil treating prostate cancer. I can’t say for sure that it is not working as my PSA numbers were down the last test. However, I do seem to becoming somewhat symptomatic with perhaps enlargement. I can’t really tell but seems possibly enlarged from when first diagnosed. I actually don’t want to have another test and come back with bad news thinking if I don’t find out there is no problem. That is hide your head in the sand logic.
That whole area of the body is so susceptible to all the things the body is exposed to. If you think everything we eat, drink and is taken into our body is then processed and for the most part concentrated and gathered there prior to discharge. With all the toxins and poisonous substances we take in on a daily basis that find their way there it is no wonder the increased incidence of cervical, testicular, uterine, bladder, colon and prostate ailments people have these days.
I have altered my diet and lifestyle as I am again vegetarian for the 4th time. The last time I was vegetarian ended about four years ago and had a duration of about 2 years. After that time I usually get bored of no meat. I am also trying to eat all organic or local healthy type foods. I exercise and do not drink alcohol outside an occasional few sips of red wine.
The original recommendation was to do robotic surgery and remove the prostate. My younger brother had hormone treatment along with radiation which sounded terrible also particularly with his side effects from the procedures. My dad had FAR WORSE treatment, going through an orchectomy. My thoughts were after seeing what the conventional treatment entails and the possible negative outcomes from these various barbaric modalities and regimens to look elsewhere.
I researched cannabis oil and found some very promising results and outcomes but all anecdotal. My thoughts were I am going to be in the cannabis industry, particularly advocating medical marijuana for treatment. Wouldn’t it be great if I took the round of Rick Simpson Oil at a gram a day for 90 days and was cured of cancer. I will have drank the KoolAid and been cured. This will be great, I will be a pioneer, I will be a leader in the industry, cured of cancer by this miracle plant. I even started working on keynote speeches I would be asked to give and end with “There is an old saying ‘When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.’ my thought is ‘When life gives you nothing but weeds, make sure it’s Cannabis.'”
But now I’m not sure if this is working. The problem with our world is that all men will get prostate cancer eventually unless the heart attack, stroke or other cancers don’t get them first. We live in a toxic environment that coupled with all the stress we endure it’s a surprise we live as long as we do. Women have to cope with threats of breast, uterine and cervical cancers similarly that men do with prostate and testes. Prostate cancer is one of the less aggressive and severe as other forms of malignancies. However it can still kill.
6:05 PM PDT
I had to do some work today. Oh shit, I need to make phone call. I’ll be back. I’m back. I’ll write some and then call. This is all like tweets but I’m not sure what medium I want to use right now. So will save here. I called grower that was looking for $1.5 million to introduce him to a promoter I talked with today. The promoter has a publicly traded company looking for profitable operations to merge into. I’d get a finders fee of equity and cash, which would be substantial. That especially to the whiny little depressed thing in my video from his morning. I feel a lot better as I medicated myself and actually functioned today. Talked with a three people today about raising funds. Did the ticket business.
11:12 PM PDT
I said I wasn’t going to do any more videos but I did several more this evening but I actually think lot of useful material me talking on the phone with other people. It is more to do another promo piece and not sure if can use this for a show because no releases. I was also think some of the stuff it will all have to be rated restrictive as it’s not PG. There are so many inappropriate for general audiences and probably inappropriate in general. There is no nudity but talk about sex and drugs. We will see. I’ll upload the videos o YouTube as private and find a videographer probably on Fiverr to produce some promo pieces.
I do feel better and somewhat cleansed by posting the two articles yesterday. As I said previously it gives a sense of catharsis. I could have chosen a less public forum than the internet as a private journal would probably be more appropriate. But, that wouldn’t get me on television as MJ Mike. As that character I believe viewers would have a polarity to me as they would either hate me or love me. That because I am this self-centered, egotistical megalomaniac that can be overly personable. With the subject matter and a good cast and crew I think it will be a successful show.
Somebody asked me why I would want to be on TV particularly a reality show. I joked it would be a great way to meet women. I just think the show will be great.
As I said my thrust of these posting now will be to record what the effects and side effects are with my treatment using RSO, a treatment record so to speak. I had been keeping a journal when I first started treatment but dropped off after a few months and became sporadic. All those records can be found on my computer in saved emails, text files on the computer and saved emails and text messages on my phone. Of course that’s if someone finds this information matter interesting and useful at a later time.
Anyways, I have been acting differently lately. I don’t believe I have Asperger’s but been irritable and do make inappropriate disclosures sometimes. I do believe I could not say something but I think, why not say it or do it? Life is way too short to be repressed by yourself or suppressed by others. The incident the other day with the firemen and police office could have been handled differently on my part but also with them too. The outcome was the same whether I had said anything of not. They moved the fire truck when they were done and ready to leave. Maybe I was being unreasonable but at the time I thought they were too.
I was posting about my dog being so stupid she won’t come in out of the rain but I went jogging in it. Who is stupid there? I passed an African man carrying an umbrella and I thought should I say it or not and I did say something about his umbrella just to be friendly. I discerned he was African by his accent. I told him good morning, asked how he was and then was jokingly critical of his umbrella. Was it inappropriate? Maybe. Did I find it funny? Yes. So I told him I used to carry an umbrella, but now I moved here and dress like this. Told him to have a good day and jogged off.
Was it rude to say that to him? Maybe, but I believe it is more rude to ignore people and not say anything. People may not find what I say always enjoyable, but it pleases me. I don’t feel as accepted here in Portland as I was in Texas. People are friendly and nice here, but I really haven’t developed the ties I had in Texas. I haven’t even seen my daughter, nor my 2 grandchildren since moving here last November. She says she is really busy with work, family everything but we could get together at least for coffee once in 11 months.
The post picture above is me with my 2 good friends Fred and Christina I have known since being a stockbroker. He is a reformed alcoholic, bible thumping Christian so we have different opinions on some things. I love them to death and was really close as we have stayed friends all these years. Laura thought they were possessed by demons and severed ties a year or so ago. This whole paragraph is an example of inappropriate disclosure as the above sentence could be construed as disparaging 2 people at once.
I have Laura living with me but we are not sleeping together. I said I would never be in a relationship like that. We were divorced in 2000 but were living together in Texas until last October 2015, then I moved here to Oregon, a non community property state, so I would consider us divorced as we seem to be from different planets now. She hinders me more than helps me to have her around me. I need a REAL girl friend that I am sleeping with and can actually talk with and not get upset.
I moved to Gresham which doesn’t help establishing friendships and contacts. It is about 15 miles into Portland itself so I kind of feel isolated out here. I don’t feel like I have the people around me that I need to be happy and prosperous. I just don’t sense as being as self reliant here as in Texas and it maybe my support structure there was more concrete. As I said I feel isolated. I work from my home by myself with my “roommate” sleeping in bed with the door closed until about 4 PM every day . Which is fine because when she does get up she just upsets me by her complaining about my lack of production.
That is kind of ironic that she would bitch about me not producing enough income when she stays in bed until 4 PM. I have asked her why she would think I would have a desire to support her. Her job when we were married was to motivate me to produce and she is not motivating me now. Laura jokes she is a retired Ho but my thought is I didn’t set up a Ho retirement plan. I’m still working, she has to also and if not with me then somebody else. A companion should make you feel better about yourself and compliment you. That is what she did for 20 years. Now she makes me feels worse about myself. See I am an asshole.
Just go off a 17 minute phone conversation with Mary, with me complaining about my plight here. I hate this thing of being needy crap because that’s what it is. People will ask me how I am doing and my stock answer is usually “I can’t complain, well I could but no one wants to hear it so I stopped complaining about things. How are you?” Or I will say that “I am tolerated by many but tolerable of few.” Both of those usually get a laugh with the later me expressing my position that it’s okay for me to say or do what I want to but not you, which again doesn’t seem right. Maybe that attitude is why haven’t developed any real friendships here yet only acquaintances. I haven’t become Portland Nice as I guess I am still Texas Angry. I don’t know if I would call it angry but it definitely is not nice.
It is Sunday afternoon and haven’t gotten a lot accomplished except writing on this blog. I posted my morning thoughts – particularly about “Does God Exist in Portland”. I was reading what I wrote on April 19th under Morning Thoughts:
“You will know you have attained your goal when you can do it effortlessly. “When you have learned to walk on the rice paper.” When you can walk without being seen by the motion detector. If you have to be undetected you won’t be. If you have to believe something is true then it won’t be. It has to be effortless to be true.”
First of all, I copied and pasted that whole paragraph into the Google search box and only 2 results came back and they were links to the posting from the original posting. I thought the excerpt was pretty cool, I wondered who wrote it originally. I know about the rice paper part, that was from the TV show “Kung Fu” with Kwai Chang Caine. The rest I thought profound so I started searching on Google for the different phrases. I first did a search for You will know you have attained your goal when you can do it effortlessly
That took me to a page talking about earth angels, andGemma Patricia Bowler – 1988-2016, a recently deceased 28 year old jewelry designer. There I found reference to the Law of Attraction which someone I met recommended for me to read last week.
I hear stuff about a new age dawning and that when that happens we go into a different dimension and people won’t make sense or be misunderstood. I sure don’t understand Laura any longer. What does all this mean? I meet a guy while I’m waiting for the bus to go home from night at the NW Cannabis Club. He looks like he is homeless and someone to avoid. Then he turns to me and calls me by name and said I need to listen and not talk as much all serious. Then he drops out of that character and back to the homeless guy. Gets on the bus and is ranting about crap so no one takes him seriously, when he gets off gives me a thumbs up and smirk of a smile. It was weird like he was there to talk with me and then vanish. The guy last Sunday recommending Law of Attraction, which makes sense that you attract like thoughts and people. You get what you need and want. So I end up at the page HERE. That is exactly what these atheists go on and on about – shit you can’t prove that just sounds like it could or would be great if it did. What it turned out to be was another variation on a Twelve Step Program.
I searched for something on the sentence I had there about motion detectors. All I could find were articles about how they work and how to: Tips To Avoid Being Spotted By Motion Detectors so I don’t think that line was mentioned by anyone in the past in this context.
Next I searched the sentence If you have to be undetected you won’t be. on Google and all the results had to do with HIV virus which was really strange as these seem to be unrelated or so I thought. Also, I am not sure of the significance of that phrase by itself anyways. What does that mean anyways. I think the meaning is the same as the next line If you have to believe something is true then it won’t be. If you have to have something, if it is so important to you you can’t live without it, chances are it is going to slip out of your grasp whether it is tangible or not. Let the eagle fly it will return. The same is true of money, possessions and people. If you have to have it you can’t.
The last line of that posting was It has to be effortless to be true. WTF does that mean? So I will cop out and do a search for that term. Hmm everything comes back in relation to LOVE. effortless love. That’s a bunch of bullshit. Effortless love, that would be nice. Love and relationships are constant work or they will be consistently gone. It is hard to be in a relationship and not constantly screwing something up. I didn’t do this, I did that, I forgot to do something or failed to remember other points. You have to pay the toll to get love.
So anyways I read that paragraph I wrote 6 months ago and thought this was some good shit, as normally I would be super critical of anything I wrote and ask someone to look over it first as I am not objective. Then I wondered who actually wrote it and now I think it was me. I am critical about the things I read, but now I think that this is actually something worth reading and I thought this was good:
“You will know you have attained your goal when you can do it effortlessly. “When you have learned to walk on the rice paper.” When you can walk without being seen by the motion detector. If you have to be undetected you won’t be. If you have to believe something is true then it won’t be. It has to be effortless to be true.”
Maybe I will be a writer, as I do have some interesting material. Hell, if I told all I would probably have a bounty put on my head. I haven’t ever met Hillary, just all her friends.
I was going to leave that last post up as the home page for this blog but that is what a blog does – CHANGE. So here is what I have today. I was thinking about changing or actually have changed the direction for the home page of MJ Consulting. The 280E emphasis is just NOT WORKING. I haven’t made a sale of that. I have this ad agency that can sell a lot of different products – promo products, websites, SEO, video, ads and really just about anything including white labeled social media campaigns. The thing that is supporting me is this ticket business, Jake said he did $1 million last year and half was from cannabis biz owners so expanding the ticket business further into cannabis would be I believe ideal. Still continue to do the 280E but also include coffee. I’m calling all this the 3 C s of Life – Concerts, Coffee & Cannabis. That will be the direction of MJ Consulting Services now overseeing the different divisions of operations:
I’m going to do a video on people coming to the website for MJ Consulting and seeing we are about the 3 C s of concerts, coffee and cannabis. WTF? concerts, coffee and cannabis, how are they related? How are they not related. That was my last blog post about ticket brokers, why anyone would want to be one and how is all this related? Getting over the negatives of ticket scalping and making money from ticket brokering – that is what I have to promote.
I have so much to say and not enough typing skills – LOL. I wrote 2 articles about What Is a Ticket Broker? and How Concerts and Cannabis are Related? for LinkedIn and social media. Trying to get more traction on this cannabis business as the ONLY thing supporting me now is my ticketing business. I need to figure out how to get this agency business going. I am not making any sales to speak of and can’t hire anyone – no money. And I am really bummed about my girlfriend situation or lack of. I am not used to being in this kind of place with no one I feel close to. It seems like all the possibilities I have are either mentally deranged or damaged in some way. I don’t feel like I have any real friends here since I can’t really be friends with anyone I don’t trust enough or that doesn’t trust me enough to have sex with. I mean sex should be somewhat special and I’m definitely over the casual sex thing. When I was in my 20s and 30s I was a lot less picky and I probably should be now that I am this age – LOL again.
Relationships are weird. I have some women that do hit on me now but for the most part the ones that do are in my same age and weight class and they just don’t do it for me. I read an article some woman was complaining about all the unwanted advances she gets. I guess I was spoiled over the years being a successful doctor and then stockbroker. Now being older and having no hair there are not as many offers needless to say.
Right now I have really 3 women in my life that I am involved with and currently I’m not getting laid by anyone! The first is my ex-wife the physician and she would have sex with me at the drop of a hat or me simply asking. She also would support me financially if I so chose. The problem is she lives and works 2000 miles away and I’m really not into phone sex. I really don’t like condom sex and KNOW that as many STDs out there its a must these days with someone new.
I presently have my other ex-wife, the former dancer living with me and my dog here in Oregon. I am supporting her as she is completely disabled due to her mental condition. We are also not having sex because of my current possession by demons, alien robots, vampires or whatever can and is imagined. She has been in and out of mental institutions the last 4 years. I believe without me she would be homeless and on the street. She can be very difficult dealing with her condition.
Lastly, I do have a sort of “girlfriend” (I am writing all this for myself and not anyone else). We met a few weeks ago. I let her know that I am very sexually attracted to her. She said it’s not me she is just not attracted to anyone – man or woman. She doesn’t dress like she is not trying to sexually attract someone and she says she got out of a relationship with her fiance who has Aspergers Syndrome. She is damaged. I like her and would like more but when I asked her out and she tells me she has other plans already. Or when we went to a movie she brought a girl friend. (I would have been up for a Menage a Trois but wasn’t offered one) I can see that she has some hangups about sex, what it is intended for and how to use it – most people do. Well I’m used to being in a place where other plans are not a consideration. I want to be with someone that I am the most important thing or person in their life and the same for me with them. I want to be with someone that has my back and I have theirs. I mean prior commitments are important but I want to be the guy that my girlfriend says “Susan, Mike asked me out for Saturday night and I have to go out with him and cancel dinner with you, I mean he makes me so HOT!!!” That’s what I used to get, I’m not getting it now and I miss that.
I am going to write a blog post about that, Difference in a Friend and an Acquaintance. I am thinking about posting it on that woman’s blog site https://onmogul.com The gist of it will be that if you don’t trust me enough to have sex why would I trust you to be my friend. It is rather shallow but true.
Everyone has a sex drive, it’s just that some of us have suppressed it more than others because of various personal reasons but usually for the wrong ones. It is not some evil, dirty, bad thing if it were it just wouldn’t feel so good physically and emotionally. It is not some magic thing that should be rationed out, controlled or avoided altogether. At the same time it is not some commodity that is to be used for manipulation, cunning or deceit.
Over my adult lifetime I have been approached by both men and women desiring a sexual encounter with me and I have rejected others myself. First of all, I’m not gay, I don’t have a problem with gay. The problem I have is I’m not gay and am tired of people trying to talk me into convincing me “I just haven’t had the right one.” I just don’t care.
Secondly, I do have a physical preference for women. I may not be extremely picky, but I do have my preferences as to race, hair color, age, weight, personality and various others things. There is no one trait that I find more attractive than others but appeal is a personal thing. That said, recently I had coffee with a woman I met online.
Initially, I was not that attracted to her as she was about 40 pounds overweight and didn’t look like she ever exercised. That’s not a bad thing, just not the way I operate. We had coffee and a great conversation. When we were leaving I told her she was a lot more attractive to me after talking for 2 hours than when I first sat down. Unfortunately for me she did not take it as a compliment that I was attracted to her mind and not her body so she texted me the next day to cancel our following date. I could have been friends with her, she just didn’t want to go through the gauntlet.
Today is my birthday! Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me. I’ve had several people call me to wish me well. It has been 5 months since I’ve been on this site and written on this blog. There has been a lot happen since then and then again not much. I’m still being treated with RSO. My ticketing business is doing well – only thing making me money. Haven’t gotten any dispensaries to put in the ticket brokerage nor coffee bistro even though EVERYONE says its great. Haven’t been able to hire any sales people as have no money to pay a base salary and no one will work on straight commission with a new company. My daughter called to wish me happy birthday even though I haven’t seen them since moving here in November. I don’t want to say anything about girlfriend/ex wife as that is definitely not where I want it or even expect that aspect of my life to be. Yea – Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me.
Still haven’t made the posting live on Indiegogo I am laying groundwork for the television program with the contacts I’m making. I am talking with 2 people this week about co-founder – A lawyer and an accountant. I do need someone else to help me with this. Woke up this morning with a headache – too much dabs? The NW Cannabis Club I joined will be a great place to make contacts and meet people. And there is an interesting element there. Think it will be great for the show. I’m doing some raw footage to condense into a 45 sec promo piece for the Cannabis Reality show.
Someone gave me a cap last night and think may start wearing a cap instead of my bald head. I may shave my head and wear caps – baseball or like this. May make me look little younger and more accepted. You know my main goal with this whole business is to meet women – LOL.
I am still delaying posting the cannabis reality project on Indiegogo. I want to get some feed back and haven’t yet. I’ve asked several people to eval and give me feedback. But as you can see don’t want to be bothered by this written journal. I have to think about speling and typing (LOL came back and see misspelled word spelling – irony) rather than let it flow – could get a recorder – well that’s what the tv show is. I went to the atheists meeting this morning – I get the felling (misspelled feeling – probably my typing) that I am foreign to them but enjoy going and talking with them. I mean I am opinionated but they are too. They think it is not OK for everyone to have a right to their beliefs but if they don’t agree they should discuss their disagreement. People’s philosophy are set and no matter what you are not going to change that person and why should they. This needs to get out there on the TV show. Anyway I was watching Blue Bloods and Frank asks the cop in trouble if you could get a do-over would there be anything you would do differently. What is the answer? No – then OK move on we’re done here. Yes – OK then let’s relive that again. – The past, the present and the future. – conviction, punishment and rehabilitation….
I also got to thinking about this 280E solution and will need to do some kind of posting on it – to explain away this objection. Mary – the oncologist stated she was looking for new accountant and she didn’t want to get a daredevil. Someone that would take risks which I would call an innovative accountant. I said what she needed wasn’t an accountant but rather a bookkeeper. Said “no I need an accountant.” An accountant should find different tax planning/saving methods and present them with a recommendation. To just do the status quo is not fulfilling their fiduciary responsibilities. The client can accept or reject the suggestion as they are the one paying the bills. But as one CPA in Colorado that only works in cannabis told his clients. “Don’t do anything and just pay the taxes. Nothing we can do” – I told him that kind of attitude that there is “nothing we can do” was what got 6 million Jews killed during WWII. Maybe that is stretching it but in this industry the effective tax rate can be as high as 90% with 280E. But then I thought about what a cannabis attorney in Colorado said – they represent clients that are “Our clients are trailblazers, building a new and vibrant industry from scratch.” What MJ Consulting is taking the IRS code and using it to help lessen the effects of 280E. Everyone in this industry is going to be audited and i don’t think it is reckless to take deductions that you are entitled to. And really most businesses are able to take normal business deductions. It is not that accountant’s money it is our money that is being saved by this. I have an easy to implement solution, that is cost effective, people even tell me – hey this is brilliant. If it is so fucking brilliant why doesn’t someone help run with it?
Supposed to have meeting today regarding business. Got sidetracked with groceries and job applicants. Got this email from “Cannabis Conscious 1/31” with a piece on the benefits of CBC on cancer treatment. However, in their piece the chart on Cannabinoid Education it lists CBC as encouraging cell growth rather than “inhibit tumor growth” as is stated. It is CBD that does this not CBC. And the treatment regimen I would follow is 60 grams of cannabis oil taken over a 90 day time window. This at a ratio of 50:50 THC to CBD.
I need money to make this business happen.
I posted a job request on Indeed. This for a Ticket Broker Trainee – to learn the business from me and expand on that. Guy I talked with Darren seemed to be a fit – money motivated to help his family – what would you do for money – are you honest and loyal. Do whatever it takes does not sound honest – but that could depend on your level of ethics and how desperate you were? I mean its easy to be ethical when everything is taken care of and no worries about anything. But how desperate does someone have to become in order to violate their own ethical code for a bag of silver? He seemed like a fit so will talk again Monday.
Also Paige Sayles applied – she did have something on her resume about working in a Starbucks – interested and asked what she learned while working at Starbucks – what I recall was she had only worked there 1 month experience but the attachment here shows lot more. It is interesting in that the thing that really gets these dispensaries on board is not the ticket brokerage but rather the coffee shop. A coincidence or someone that wants to be hired?
Good, call me Monday afternoon about 4 PM PST.
We are a new ancillary business in the cannabis industry which is right now in its infancy. We believe we are addressing a niche which is not being currently handled but has the potential of being huge. If you have sincere interest on coming on board and getting a piece of the pie please follow these steps. There are 3 phases of the interview because this is a sales position. First you need to email me and convince me to give you a phone interview. Second, the phone interview will consist of convincing me you can sell over the phone. If you handle those 2 tasks well we can arrange a personal interview. Thanks and look forward to meeting you. Send to email@example.com However, before you do any of this become familiar with our 2 websites and what we do – www.mjconsultingservices.com and www.280esolutions.com. We are implementing additional businesses into retail cannabis operation to help mitigate tax burdens. This in the form of an online ticket brokerage and a coffee shop/bestro.
I’m getting signage for the Ticket Business as EZ Ticket and for the Consulting Business as MJ Consulting Services. Initially tomorrow should have the front door and windows then next week the outside signs. This should increase the foot traffic and sales for EZ Ticket. As of right now the ticket business is what I am living on for support. It’s not coming from investors nor other sales or subscriptions. I would like to diversify with MJ Consulting and all the other offerings.
Today was the general election here in the Untied States. I had planned to vote even though my candidate had no chance. I figured that Hilary would win hands down. I just couldn’t bring myself to vote for her. It is probably the connection she has with the $10,000 a plate dinners. Anyone that knows me knows what I am talking about.
I did not vote for what appears to be our next president, Donald Trump. I just hope my brother is right and he is our savior. We will see. He is our President and he deserves the respect and support for that position now. He has earned that right but it is up to him to lose it if he so chooses. But I didn’t start writing this about who I voted for. If you are interested you can check it out here. And BTW, why would The Don look so angry above? He can now take on the role that Bill Clinton had as Philanderer in Chief.
What I wanted to post about is how difficult it was to actually vote. We are doing this reality tv gig and thought what a great segment but my videographer was trimming bud for $10 an hour. We don’t have the funds to pursue this and eat.
At first I thought no big deal as I’ll drive over to the library, show my ID and vote. No big deal and not very exciting. When I got there all I saw was a line of cars dropping off ballots into the drop box. Where are the voting machines as we had in Texas. All voting ballots in Oregon are printed and usually mailed. So I went home to get my printed ballot. That was no where to be found. However I did find the printed primary ballot from May 17, but that wouldn’t work. So I went on line and found if you are military, out of the country or disabled. I do get SSI so I can claim disability? I’m not sure who can vote online because I couldn’t.
After prodding so many followers, friends and associated to get out and vote I did feel obligated to vote today. Also, you can never complain about a politician if you didn’t participate in the process of getting them there. I called up the Multnomah County election headquarters as was told I would be required to come down there to get another printed ballot and submit there. I did not want to drive there to vote, I know who is going to win, my vote won’t make a difference, it’s to far, it’s too cold. I’ll just “say” I voted. People “say” all kind of things at times, but they are still lies and I don’t want to lie anymore, it destroys your soul. So I hopped on the Trimet and went to vote.
It took over an hour with the transfer to the bus. Here are some pictures of this trip but the selfie video will never see the light of day. I stood in line for over an hour. To break up the monotony and show support for voters a team of benefactors raised from what I heard $373,000 to deliver Pizza To The Polls was in place. When the election official gave me 3 large pizzas I enjoyed going down the line offering a slice to everyone in line. I guess my narcissistic nature came out when Channel 12 interviewed me, as I never thought I’d enjoy the limelight.
This whole new business surrounding the cannabis industry is exciting, especially our reality tv gig. The feedback from the people I come in contact with are also exciting and full of energy. So I voted like I told so many others to. The whole process took over 4 hours. It wasn’t easy to vote. I had a ton of other things I could have done. I needed to vote because I wanted to vote. Good luck Don.
10-28-16 6:02 PM PDT
I usually reserve to post anything for Evening Thoughts for articles generated after 6 PM. It’s 4:51 now but I probably won’t post until later after 6 PM.
I have had several inquiries lately about our 280E solution with the ticketing kiosk. I have had many accountants and attorneys comment: “This is brilliant, how did you come up with it?” The results for me have been to date dismal and not sure why. My theory is people just don’t want to think about taxes. But I will tell you here goes:
The Tax Problem for Cannabis Related Businesses
The Internal Revenue Code Section 280E states the following in regards to businesses operating in the medical marijuana industry:
No deduction or credit shall be allowed for any amount paid or incurred during the taxable year in carrying on any trade or business if such trade or business (or the activities which comprise such trade or business) consists of trafficking in controlled substances (within the meaning of schedule I and II of the Controlled Substances Act) which is prohibited by Federal law or the law of any State in which such trade or business is conducted.
In a 2007 case, Californians Helping to Alleviate Medical Problems (CHAMP), the Tax Court allowed business deductions for the “patient care” portion of a medical marijuana dispensary in addition to the firm’s costs of goods sold. CHAMP was a not-for-profit entity under California law with a mission to provide caregiving services to members of the community with debilitating diseases. As such, business deductions under Sec. 162(a) for the caregiving portion of the business were permitted, and Sec. 280E would not prohibit these deductions “simply because the taxpayer was also involved in trafficking in a controlled substance.” The Tax Court further stated that the IRS regularly permits a taxpayer to engage in more than one business unless the separate characterization is artificial or unreasonable. This is why we set up an example entity “CannaTixx.com” This is a related business having its physical location the same as a cannabis business. It has separate expenses that are shared with an existing business which are all legally deductible.
To find out more about 280E and its effects on cannabis businesses visit our website HERE. (BTW it’s 6:02 now.)
10-18-16 9:44 PM PDT
I am making progress on all fronts but I am very dissatisfied with the amount and rapidity of those occurrences. A woman who I have developed a friendship with came back to Oregon and we had a good conversation on the phone. She is just not interested in a physical relationship with me now. I asked her if she had any attraction to me because that “just be friends” doesn’t sit with me. I did tell her that there are a lot of women I have been friends with that I haven’t slept with. The problem is probably the women that I have been interested in as a possible mate that just wanted to be friends I haven’t stayed friends with very long.
I suppose I’ve gotten to this spot in my life that I don’t feel like I have the time, energy or desire to have a long, drawn out development of a business, relationship or group I’m a part of. If I’m putting forth the effort I need to see returns soon. Unfortunately, I don’t feel like I have the resources to do Pro Bono in any area of my life right now.
Yesterday I talked about how to stop being needy. The key to that is knowing the difference between needs and wants. Others will tell you what you need to do. You know what you need and you know what is right for you and you know the correct path to take.
“All I need is what I want.”
“All I want is what I need.”
I only bought 2 pairs of Coldplay tickets today for $1000. They will probably sell quickly and I’ll recoup a profit. I really didn’t have the funds to put there but I need to build my inventory. I could have purchased a lot more but had no money nor credit. I had about $600 cash in the bank with only about $500 CC sales so far today. Have Paypal money coming soon but not today. I need to make another car payment now.
I am tired of this low cash flow problem. I can’t say that I’ll be able to sell the tickets in 2 weeks as the show is not until next October. I could only swing a pair in the 9th row on floor in Houston and a pair side stage in lower section row P. With fees the tickets cost me $250 each. On Stubhub the lowest comparable price is $364 going up to $884. The $364 will probably sell within 24 hours from experience. So if I held these for at least 6 months I could list at $500 each and probably sell in that time frame for 100% return. However I could also probably sell now and make a 45% return in a day or two, which is the spot I am in right now. I have cash flow problems.
Being a solo entrepreneur I have done things to carry money for a day or 2. Such as the Coldplay deal. I used to take cash advances from Ace Cash Express online and then pick the money up at the store. Then go deposit the cash in the ATM bank to cover the pending overdrafts I had or to put money on a debit card to be able to buy tickets that day for presales. I haven’t been able to get good credit since getting back with Laura. Even when I was a stockbroker /investment banker I never seemed to out earn her spending.
So some of the presales require a Chase or Citicard but you can use a debit card from the bank. Even today I had to transfer money from my personal account because I got an email from the bank saying my $530 rent check at the office was paid but bounced. This business needs to start being a business and start supporting itself and me.
Ace Cash charges about 30% to lend money for 28 days, they try to have people pay back within 7 days. Ace also has a policy that you can cancel the loan. In that scenario you repay it within 72 hours and you pay no fees nor interest. So close to the 72 hour deadline I would call up and cancel the loan. Then the funds would be deducted by ACH from my bank account which would take a few days also. After I pulled that about 20 time they banned me from Ace. I called up to ask what gave them the right to violate their advertised policy and what was the reason I was being singled out. I wasn’t check kiting which is illegal. I’m not sure what it was but I think it was legal as I read their contract. I really did learn a lot about the law working in the law library.
I mean look at this 280E crap no one wants to touch but I hear accountants and attorneys say “this is brilliant, how did you come up with it?” I think “if it’s so f**king brilliant why don’t you run with it? I’m a f***ing ticket broker, but at least not a ticket scalper.
Now I have a lot more volume and history with Paypal that they will float somewhere between $1000 and $1500 for purchase. I also have a merchant advance with Paypal for $10,000 with about $2900 still owed so I can’t borrow any more from them. The $10K was at 15%. I have 10 merchant advance people calling me everyday wanting to lend me money at between 35-45%. My margin is only about 45% because of the small inventory. As Mary’s dad used to say “You can’t make chicken salad out of chicken shit.”
If the money wasn’t in the Paypal account Paypal will debit ACH. Then I would wake at 2 AM to see the red in my account that morning and figure out what I was going to hustle that day to cover it. What part of my soul was I going to sell that day?
That may sound overly dramatic. I am tired of hustling for quarters to survive. I’ll bang that drum again and bitch that I have almost 30 years of formal education which I don’t use at all as a ticket broker. I mean what good is knowing the composition of dental amalgum for me now? Having said this before, I expected at this stage in my life to be a lot further ahead financially especially where I have been positioned. I sold oil short at a record high of $45 only to be stopped out at $50 before it crashed to $5 a barrel. Again the internet was a no lose proposition back in 1998.
I would expect to have made and kept more assets by now. I don’t want to retire from working but I would like to retire from the type of work I’m doing now . It would be really great if I could get paid for doing things such as writing a blog or doing the TV interviews. That would take advertising revenue and that would take followers which I have none. I’m crying again but the only follower I have is myself coming back to post more. In defense of my writing skills I will say the blog is not promoted and actively requesting followers. I am not sure if I would have what it takes to be Kim Kardashian so have been reluctant to put myself out there for rejection. I guess I’m too sensitive.
Actually as an aside when I lamented about the lack of use to all my education, the reason that corporate America is so obsessed with having a degree. This is that it shows you can follow a systematic plan to completion. It’s not about what you learn. You don’t really learn until you do and you don’t really do until you work at doing it. Ask any processor where they learned to extract or a grower where they learned how to grow.
I wasn’t going to take a dose of med today since I have a meeting this evening but decided to take one at noon. I felt diphoretic about my head and face and just felt weird. I took my vitals and BP 150/84 and pulse 67 so took .45 ml of RSO. I am feeling emotionally and mentally lucid just not very good physically. As I said before, I did go jogging this morning and felt fine then. I would like to have someone with more experience and knowledge supervise my cannabis treatment. I am only guessing WTF I am doing.
I am also questioning the efficacy of the treatment. My last PSA test the numbers were down which is good but that was 5 months ago. I had blood work done a few weeks ago and everything there was fine even cholesterol. I thought my calcium was screwed up because getting lot of cramps in my legs lately. But they didn’t include the PSA which can be an indicator of worsening or improvement. Last time I seem to recall 3.9 and had been close to 5 before. I just do not want to hear. “Well, it’s getting worse and what you have been doing is not working. We need to do surgery or blast you with radiation, neither one of these will be any fun.”
My plan with this is that I would be cured of my prostate cancer with cannabis oil treatment. I would be like Rick Simpson or Tommy Chong and have a story. That it would kill all the cancer cells and I would be miraculously free of it and live to an astonishing 120 years. (In sixty years that will be the typical life expectancy here.) My thought was that if I am going to be in the cannabis industry and tout the benefits of cannabis I better drink the Kool-aid.
When I first considered using cannabis oil for treating prostate cancer I did research about it. For the most part it is all anecdotal with very little hard evidence. The theory and limited research on
apoptosis or cell death of the cancer cells from THC is all good. I just seem to be getting somewhat symptomatic now. I may sound too needy but I don’t feel like any woman I’m interested in outside of one 2000 miles away cares either. However, all my life I have been clueless about women’s signals to me. I am not too acute to subtlety.
This is my writing style – I drift. I need an editor but I’d rather have followers that liked it as it is.
There have been a lot of women though that I have been “friends” with (read about my definition of friends from earlier posts) that I didn’t have sex with. These were women that I really was interested in before but didn’t speak up. Now if I find a woman really attractive to me emotionally, psychologically, spiritually and physically attractive I will hit on them, but that may not be on first meeting. My goal is to be with a woman, but preferably (like this is original) 2 bisexual women and we love each other and want to have sex everyday.
I had hoped that I would be a prominent figure in the cannabis industry, giving speeches at conventions and other industry meetings. I envisioned being one of the pioneers in medical cannabis being the Founder of The Medical Cannabis Institute along with my good friend Dr. Mary Milam.
I believe everyone in the universe deserves happiness. Even the people on this planet that are only happy making others miserable should be able to be happy, but can’t you find something else? The life style I described above I think would make any man happy and the women associated with them would be happy too. I mean I would be their loving bitch. Everyone is happy. So what’s wrong with this?
Sometimes I get self-conscious about doing this blog and actually making some of this shit public. I’m doing it as a blog about my treatment for record. Part of my rhetoric with the blog could be caused by the effects of the cannabis, particularly the THC on my mental condition and mental state. I was going to put an image up but not sure what I wanted to portray. I thought of THIS image but that’s not the subject. The theme of this post is the my treatment and the inherent side effects with any medical treatment. Here goes.
I do find that admitting that I am not really whole and that I have flaws is not within my character. I was going to say that I have always been independent and self-reliant, but that’s a lie. Without the help of my family and friends I would probably be homeless now. It was a struggle after being released, particularly financially. I am being treated with cannabis for prostate, PTSD and hypertension, and it is doing remarkably well.
I had been thinking that my PTSD, if that’s what it is, had been cured by the cannabis and I was now getting back to being fully functional. The symptoms came back on me with a vengeance today. I have been in treatment for about 19 months now with cannabis oil for prostate and PTSD. The PTSD treatment has only recently been added. The first 8 months were with BHO obtained over the internet, 2 months smoking and the last 9 months have been utilizing RSO with the most recent 4 month period continually dosed.
I decided to give myself a week rest from treatment and stopped taking my RSO last Sunday. I wouldn’t necessarily say I was going through withdrawals but my body was definitely in tune with the therapeutic dosage I was taking. A surprising yet desired effect has been the stabilization of my blood pressure. I am now off taking blood pressure medication and it is well controlled. Let me go take it to prove – 127/77, pulse 73. I should mention that I lost weight over the last 6 years, as I have dropped from 206 down to 166 which may have something to do with it.
I have had uncontrolled hypertension all my life. I had gone through all these different tests and it had acted like an adrenal tumor but never found. I almost died when I got locked up, or even worse to suffer a stroke in there. I don’t ever want to sign up for that. Anyways, the cannabis seems to have stabilized the BP without medications and ALL THEIR SIDE EFFECTS.
What happened is I did go through a physical response to the stoppage of the cannabis. I became diaphoretic about my head and my blood pressure and pulse went up. BP 148/92 and 80. I jog 6 days a week so my pulse is usually below 60. So I was getting what could be called withdrawal. I was irritable and will admit depressed. I don’t know if all this is due to the stress in my life. I don’t even need to go there okay. Just say a lot of stress. Read all three storylines here and you will see. (I am fucking crazy putting all this out there on the internet. Hell, I’ve lived a lot worse embarrassment than someone criticizing my writing here. Going through strip searches 3 times a day with a bunch of perverts I think is more nerve racking than someone reading this and saying WTF. Maybe I will be in The Naked Bike Ridenext year )
I had been taking what appears to me to have been a therapeutic dose to control my symptoms and still be functional. The traditional treatment modalities side effects are way worse than me rambling on in conversation or change my train of thought to something more interesting. I had been pleased with the results but wanted to take a break to re-evaluate my treatment. My problem is I have not had someone else with expertise to oversee my treatment regimen, leaving it to me. So I was going to stop.
Yesterday my neighbor Devlin had an accident here. I don’t know how it happened but he cut his arm real badly. I was going to meet my buddy, talk about cannabis opportunities and take him to the airport. So as I was pulling out of the driveway I notice 3 people in the front yard and I see them standing over someone and there appears to be blood on him. So I put the car in park to see if my assistance is needed (medical training and kung fu will get me killed someday – LOL). I didn’t realize it was Devlin until later. He had a deep gash inside of his elbow and blood all over his groin and butt area. He was unconscious, unresponsive and fucked up. He had a pulse and was breathing. There was a broken window and so much blood it looked like he had exsanguinated. Having worked in the Dallas County ER, I saw a lot of blood, but this was a lot.
Called 911 and fire truck, ambulance and police car show up. They ask me to step back which I did. They looked like they were handling everything, nothing for me to do, I’ll go make my meeting. The problem the still running fire truck is blocking the driveway. So I ask one of the firemen if they could move the firetruck. “Yea, as soon as we’re done here.” Maybe it’s my self-centered nature but I thought they could accommodate me if they wanted to since the running fire truck was not an active component in the operation at hand. Ok, that’s fine. So the paramedics cut all his clothes off, but I did not notice an IV started on this super shocky patient, put him on a sheet, pick up the corners, put him in the ambulance and drive away. They must have done a good job though because I heard today he was still alive.
So now I ask the Lt. Fireman if they will move the truck so I can go now. Again it is when they are done. With me, since everything is about me and the situation handled and the fire truck running and the driver just standing there with his arms crossed I thought would be no problem. Firemen and policemen are great as they do protect and serve, but they can also be big jerks. There are all kinds of reasons but for the most part people that go into those fields are the alpha male character that has to let everyone know he or she is. Anyways, I said a bunch of stuff probably with the intent of him assaulting me in front of the police officer. Particularly when I asked him if he “knew the definition of the term FUCK OFF?” “What did you say?” “I don’t stutter I asked you a simple question because you are being an asshole.”
What I’m getting at is that’s not me and I’m not like that. I am normally laid back, happy and hopefully enjoyable. I was an asshole to the lieutenant and then the police officer, surprised I wasn’t arrested as I would have been in Texas. In my defense I didn’t physically confront anyone, I was just a rude SOB. I believe it was probably coming down from 6 month treatment abruptly. I have also been depressed, because…… Read everything from before or buy the book, watch the show.
This has affected my ability to function lately and is improved with the cannabis. Normally, I am super motivated to do things and accomplish tasks successfully. I just haven’t been as motivated lately. I kind of feel rejected. No real female companion here, my business struggling along with my fiances. I know I need to sell. Writing this is not paying my bills nor are all my time wasters I’ve developed to shield from rejection. There are explanations for that. I am older and testosterone drops with increased age. Hell it’s probably normal now as I was always muscled up and nearly bald before. Also, I’ve been taking a gram of RSO a day which is about 500 mg THC and 350 CBD so that could be a cause. However, I’m also depressed because I feel kind of isolated even though I’m constantly with people or talking on the phone. If I were still in Scientology I would be classified as PTS and very low tone and all my Dynamics very low also. (That may seem non-sequitur but it actually is descriptive just Google those terms.) But I’m not in Scientology, I got kicked out – excommunicated. That sounds equally weird but true. What it means is that My health is not optimum, my relationship and family situation are in the toilet, and my relations with other friends and business associate are not in tune either. I’m not happy with the way things are going and too affected by it to make an effective change. The cannabis helps. I would like to be in a place where I wouldn’t need anything, but right now I do. I sure wouldn’t want to be on Valium, Prozac or something else, this is better and my life is better.
Brain chemistry can change, as I think it did with Laura, not from cannabis but coke and meth. With that change comes new neural pathways that affect the way people function and think. These changes are not just negative with those hard drugs or negative behavior and lifestyles. There can also be positive advances from changes in feedback behavior, good environment and possibly the therapeutic effect of cannabis. People can change for the better and improve. They can get well. So I originally thought the cannabis had cured the PTSD and that is possible as mentioned above. What I think is that the cannabis oil was treating my symptoms of PTSD therapeutically like all medicines are intended with minimal side effects.
I got back on my treatment tonight, which is Thursday rather than waiting until Sunday to resume. I’ve got about 45 more days of treatment with this regimen. After that I will probably drop down to a maintenance dose but won’t stop abruptly. So that’s where I’m at with treatment now. Hopefully this is useful info.
What’s Up With Portland? I moved here last November from Texas to participate in the Green Rush of the legal cannabis industry in Oregon. MMJ has been legal here since 1998 with recreational cannabis legal as of November, 2014 and just now on October 1st can be sold in licensed recreational cannabis stores. But that is not what this post is about. It’s about weird Portland. Yes Portland is weird as there is even a sign up that says: “Keep Portland Weird” on 3rd Street between Burnside and Ankeny.
Now just because someone painted that on the outside of their building does not make Portland weird. The fact that it seems like everyone here is tatted up and down their arms and legs with so many people setting off metal detectors from their piercings does not make Portland weird either. That’s not weird to me even though I don’t have any. What is weird is dealing with people. Everyone tries to be nice here. They won’t tell you what they really think because they don’t want to offend you. Seems like all the people I talk with tell me how great my ideas are and that they should do really well, but then they have to think about it or no money to act. I deplore dishonesty and try to tell the truth all the time. It has gotten me into more trouble because like Jack said in A Few Good Men “You can’t handle the truth.” It got me several divorces and incarcerated once. There is a saying the truth will set you free but sometimes you just have to be more secretive. This blog sure isn’t a secret but blogs are not supposed to be. Anyways people in Portland are really nice, just maybe too nice and sugar coated.
Another reason I think Portland is weird is there is not any lightning here, at least not since I’ve been here and it rains A LOT. I did a search for that and came up with THIS. The article said it was because the Pacific Ocean has colder water and the air is drier, all atmospheric phenomena. I don’t think its that simple. It’s a difference in the universal cosmic gradient of positively and negatively charged ions resident in the indigenous population. I just made that up to express that the people here are not as screwed up with prejudice, suppression and the general repudiation that is rampant here in this country, especially in the RED states and really the entire world. (BTW,Oregon is almost entirely RED except for Portland)
There are many things I come across everyday which seems out of the ordinary and strange. Here is a list I found of the 15 Weirdest Things In Portland. Again nothing there seems that weird to me, of course people have accused me of being a little off a time or two so go figure. Of course, I haven’t ridden in The Naked Bike Ride yet. Not sure if I will ever – LOL.
The third thing I find really weird about Portland and all of Oregon is that there is a statute here that you cannot pump your own gas as self-service. In Texas, I was used to pumping my own gas and never blew up any gas stations from the inability to do that correctly. I am familiar how to deposit gasoline into a gas tank or gas can safely and expeditiously. I do think this is weird especially since citizens here in Oregon are able to purchase, possess and consume cannabis which is highly illegal in Texas. Maybe they think Oregonians will be too stoned to pump their gas?
Now, don’t get me wrong it’s good to have people do things for you. When I was the pillar of the community as a successful periodontist and then a stockbroker I had a maid, a group that did my yard and also my pool. I’d pay someone to wipe my butt if I could, which is kind of weird in of itself. Hey I just think its weird you can’t pump your own gas here.
I’m on a roll now as I’ve posted for Morning, Afternoon and now Evening Thoughts. I haven’t written this much – actually ever! I was going to leave this last post below from the 5th as the home page. It explains the idea of ticket broker well. I probably need to do a video on that and just keep posting. It is rather egotistical of myself to think that people would be interested in what I have to say. I mean really who am I and what have I accomplished? Some people would say nobody and nothing. I beg to differ. I have had notoriety and and been in the spotlight. I have had a LOT of education and have been successful in business. I may not have been POTUS, accomplished what Bill Gates or Mark Cuban have but I am truly somebody with valid and meaningful ideas and thoughts. Yea, because of that listen up people.
A woman just called me that I haven’t talked with for a couple of weeks. Last time I saw her was 2 weeks ago yesterday for coffee. She wanted some legal advice and even though I’m not an attorney I guess she thought I would know the answer since I have had all those legal issues. I was really attracted to her and she played the just want to be friends line with me. So anyway she evidently is not as attracted to me as I am to her. This dating game is a bunch of crap. I mean if I show too much interest they back off. It’s a compliment to tell someone you find them very attractive and sexually desirable but evidently she didn’t. I don’t look like Murray the Ticket Scalper in the picture in the below post any longer but rather the bald headed guy further down is the image I currently portray now. So I don’t think I am hideous maybe just too weird. But hey this is Portland, I should fit in.
BTW – all the tickets I had I sold for this week over the last 6 months amounted to $13,200 but additionally I ate right ate $1,300 worth of tickets for shows Monday thru Sunday – with expired, worthless tickets from Saturday amounting to $903 cost factor. If the inventory is values at a cost of $50,000 and eat $903 in a week that amounts to 1.8% of the inventory which would be very bad except for the fact that the $13,200 equaled a margin of 84% profit. That business would be doing great if I had $500K in inventory – I need some investors also not just an editor – LOL
Laura got up again today at 4:08 PM and and we had some interaction initially. I showed her some of my posts to get her approval I guess. We started watching a movie – Husbands and Wives but I have seen it so many times came back to check on tickets, money, maybe post – here I am. She comes in to my little office to ask when I can get her the $2200 I owe her. I just laugh. Something funny? No but you do seem way serious. When it comes to my money i am serious.
I think, shit no one wants to know what I think as it might land someone in court for something. I am supporting her here. She isn’t doing anything for me, actually hindering my performance working, earning and really existing. So why am I helping her? Because I CAN and what I probably SHOULD do. (click on that link to read about my take on SHOULD) Hmmm, maybe she is trying to send me a message with the movie, look at the title. I better go watch it.
I talked with a dispensary owner this week about installing the ticket broker kiosk into his reception area to help mitigate the effects of 280E but also increase traffic to his store. He said he didn’t want to be a ticket scalper. I realize now that not all people have positive opinions about the secondary ticket market. What I thought I could have said was: “Yea, I understand you wouldn’t want to do anything to damage the positive image you have developed in your neighborhood by trafficking in illegal drugs which cannabis still is. Especially if people thought you were now a licensed, legal ticket broker?” I used to be good at sales as a stockbroker. Since being a full time ticket broker the last 9 years I am not as apt to coddle people and their opinions now as I did then.
I wrote a couple of blog posts on Ticket Scalper vs. Ticket Broker and Concerts & Cannabis to explain this business better but some people just don’t like some things including ticket brokers or what they think of the ticketing business. I mean really all of the negative feedback about a marijuana business and he is afraid someone will think badly of him for re-selling event tickets? It’s a $22 billion dollar a year industry. You don’t have to be 1000 feet from a school or playground if you have a ticket brokerage.
Really, the bad name has come from the ticket scalper. When I came here last November I was “Murray The Ticket Scalper” as the picture above shows. now I am “MJ Mike” the Ad Executive and Ticket Broker seen here.
It has been 10 months since I wrote on this post for Evening Thoughts, I don’t think it was I didn’t have any thoughts – it was I was preoccupied with other thoughts, MONEY, WOMEN and POLITICS. If anyone ever reads the next post they will probably hunt me down and shoot me – especially women. I’ll probably be accused of being a self-centered misogynist – but here it is:
Difference in a Friend and an Acquaintance
I recently met a very attractive woman, whom I thought had a lot of interest in me as a man, so I put the move on her and asked her out. She came back with she wasn’t ready for that, just got out of a traumatic engagement and just wanted to be friends rhetoric. Which is fine and is her prerogative, and is ok but don’t tell me you want to be my friend when you reject me from one of the most friendly and trusting acts two humans can experience together. The truth is a lot better. If you are not attracted to someone say it. Don’t try to veil it with let’s just be friends and then show up at some mixer with the hot guy from sales. Happened to my buddy couple weeks ago.
A cup of coffee is nice and conversation while on a walk in the park is significant in getting to know a person. Building a friendship takes time in understanding what makes that other person tick and what they like and don’t like. Doing things for that other person is a two way street whether it’s checking up on your friend to make sure they are all right or remembering their birthday. Being a friend is not just complimenting the other but rather is your friend lifting up your spirits when you are down and you cheering them up when they are down.
A true friend is the one that you turn to when you can’t solve your problems yourself. When your world has come crashing down they are the one that props you up and has your back. The friend is the one you can trust, the one you confide in and bare your inner soul to. A true friend trusts you and you trust them.
When I practiced dentistry in Texas I thought I had a lot of friends. When things went badly for me I realized the difference between a friend and an acquaintance.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying you can’t be friends with an acquaintance, and that your interactions with your business associates and acquaintances can’t be friendly, but are they the ones you would go to if you REALLY needed to? Of course not. There is an old saying you don’t borrow money from a friend and that’s a given because the friend doesn’t lend you the money you need, they give it to you. You wouldn’t be asking for it if you didn’t need it, because you wouldn’t be a friend asking for money you didn’t really need but only wanted.
The same is true about sex. As I said above, sex is probably the most friendly and trusting act two humans can experience together. That’s when it is mutual and sharing. If someone trusts someone else enough to share sex together I would consider them friendly. Someone that rejects another’s advances is doing exactly that, rejecting the other person. Rejection is not a friendly act. So someone that trusts someone enough, but more importantly to them is that they trust the other person enough to have sex with, that person is worthy enough to be their friend. It just doesn’t equate when someone says they just want to be friends with someone but rejects their advances of friendship. It sounds strange but it is not friendly to say “I just want to be friends.”
I do have a lot of acquaintances that I interact with in social and business situations, and usually I try to keep things friendly. However, over the years there have been lessons learned about business dealings, friendships, handshakes, verbal communications and intentions. Cynicism is a developed trait and sinks in from a life of disappointments, lies and mistrust and usually not one sided. When someone is young and for the most part naive, they are very trusting and accept others for face value. They are usually for the most part trustworthy themselves. The corporate, business world seems to develop all those negative qualities in oneself those of mistrust, cynicism, secrecy, greed, loss of ethics and dishonesty. Since being in and around the cannabis culture I am surrounded with many more positive traits than the ones so evident in the corporate and business world. That will be a separate post writing about cannabis: Trust, Ethics & Money.
While in Texas practicing periodontics, I was doing very well. I was a member of several organizations. President of my Rotary Club and the Toastmasters Club I belonged to. I was on a committee for the Chamber of Commerce to welcome new businesses into the community and was even asked to run for a position on the local school board. I had what I thought were a lot of friends. There was a very tragic event that occurred in my office in which a patient died.
I was found professionally, financially and criminally liable for the death. Subsequently, I lost pretty much everything, career, family, what I thought were friends and I had to declare bankruptcy and start over from scratch at 40. On top of that I was excommunicated from my church and convicted, sentenced and served 4 years in prison. There I came in contact with a lot of people that wished to be my “friend” but never were successful (I never had to take it up the butt or suck anyone off). I had a lot of acquaintances there that I would eat with, play dominoes and work out with. There was always this underlying feeling of mistrust and paranoia that permeated that environment. It was just different and needs were different.
Unfortunately with men I have never felt completely comfortable. It seems that I have always been blessed to be with a woman that all men have desired and wished to have as their significant other, especially when I was a stockbroker/investment banker. I was always the character Frank from the movie Scarface dealing with the Tony Montanas. Tony said he never lied but he sure was always about himself. It is hard to have someone as a friend that is a self-centered, egotistical megalomaniac and a lot of the people in that industry were and still are.
There is so much charge, emotion and potential upset associated with sex and it is unnecessary. Sex is and should be special. It is the culmination of personal communication between people. It can also be a source of great pain, abuse, hostility and remorse if approached from a monolithic, selfish standpoint. I can talk about this now from this viewpoint, having matured away from casual, selfish, meaningless sexual encounters to fulfilling relationships. I have very few friends now but a ton of friendly acquaintances.
My friends are the few women that I feel really close with and have sexual relations with. They are the ones that I trust and they trust me. These thoughts maybe described as rather shallow and banal and from a practical standpoint they are. However, it serves me to tell the difference between a true friend and a mere acquaintance.
Why do I think people would pay to subscribe to My Blog?
I would be interesting in that I am starting a new business in the new Cannabis Industry. I’m doing this from a difficult situation as I am not funded but rather doing this from a shoestring budget.
I am starting this new business when most people my age start thinking about retiring. I moved across country to a new area for me. This is exciting to see what happens to this “Old Fart”.
Since I am in the cannabis industry I have elected to treat myself with Medical Marijuana extracts and derivatives rather than with conventional western medicine. If I am going to preach about the positives of cannabis I need to “Drink the Koolaid”.
The Blog is a stepping stone to a reality TV Series about a new cannabis business and the events and days involved with it.
I am going through a divorce after a long term relationship for except for the 4 years in prison spanned 25 years. Along with what happens there. If written right that would be interesting in of itself – not to mention I’m barred from posting anything on social media by the court. She would be a very interesting character – ex-dancer, made money from going on dates with men, been hospitalized 3 times in the last year and a half for mental issues – and outside of our separation for her elderly abuse conviction – there are many more things. Just talk with her as she would be an interesting character.
Understanding about how the event ticket business works and how I had supported my family after losing my previous occupations and other turmoil in life is also noteworthy and could be very interesting. I will give a running overview of the ticket brokerage business and explaining how to integrate it into the cannabis business along with the coffee bistro.
So subscribe to our blog – It will be more than worth the subscription fee – We guarantee it!
I was watching Evan the Great movie after getting up as I fell asleep after watching Oregon defeat Kansas into the Final Four. I had commented I had hoped to have had more money this time last year, and now actually. I would have more play off tickets now. So I would have more money – LOL. Evan the Great is fascination in that in order to maintain our sanity in the current real world we have to watch insanity in a fantasy world. In this case the fantasy is participated with is television. People that act insane bring that level of participation into the current real world. People would think I were insane to verbalize that I see and hear things that others do not. Thus if God appeared and wanted me to build an ark that would be insane. Maybe atheists profess there is no God because maybe they can hear God and to fit into society they don’t want to build the ark. Just a thought.
12-02-16 11:05 AM PST
Yesterday was the 10 year anniversary of the death of my brother-in-law,. He “suffered” Down’s syndrome for 52 years here on earth. He was a very funny dude coming up with so many what we called “Tommyisms” as he was very witty. I believe he chose to be Down’s syndrome for this lifetime as it has its plusses and minuses. He would instruct you on how life really played out, then comment “Now you know that now.” and end by saying “I’m smart.” He truly was smart as he would have others wait on him to do his bidding and then wink at me. I called him on it one time accusing him of playing people. He then looked at me as he came out of character, smiled and said “yea, you got me.” and went back into his character. But what does that have to do with today, 10 years later?
I have noticed that for someone to be judged as to their importance in this society there are basically 4 characteristics. These are intelligence quotient or IQ, education, life experience but probably the most significant is that of social presence.
The first three are actually the most important as to giving someone the innate ability to judge a situation that presents itself as to validity of the project and the potential to accomplish a positive outcome. Social presence gives you the ability to convince someone you can accomplish your task. It is salesmanship.
The great leaders may have not been the brightest, the most educated nor the most well rounded individuals but they did have the ability get have others follow them.
It does seem that this society judges someone’s ability and worth as to how much money and possessions they have amassed. People with money point to the lack of money as stupidity and inability to intelligently produce. Does a varied life experience equate to success in finances? I believe success in business equates to a narrow viewpoint which is self interest. Now don’t get me wrong, people need money to survive and you can survive with more money than less. However, in this country the head of all finances inevitably is a former head of that investment firm, Goldman Sachs. I do know when I was a stockbroker/investment banker the mantra of our firm was – “The house made money, the broker made money. Hey two out of three ain’t bad.”
11-10-16 12:30 AM PST
There have been numerous protests yesterday and last night in reaction to our newly elected President Donald Trump. I took the train to a meeting last night but decided to turn around because service was discontinued before my destination. There was no real rioting as it appeared to be a disjointed gathering of agitated individuals walking the streets.
This reminds me of the days when I attended anti-war rallies and draft card burnings in the late 60s and early 70s. Nothing ever became of those protests. The war ended when it was no longer economically advantageous to carry on. We moved on to Big Oil, Big Pharma and Big Drugs – coke, crack and meth. This election was in essence between the haves and the have nots. The division between those supported by this society and those that are being dismissed because of race, sex, age, religion, nationality or creed. These are the exact things we are supposed to be protected by the constitution.
President Trump was elected by a minority of the popular vote. A difference of less than 203,000 but still less than half. That majority is not used to not getting their way and there is much unrest and despair present. I did not vote for Hillary Clinton and neither did I vote for Donald Trump. Approximately 60 million people did vote for each however.
President elect Trump has earned the respect and support of the American people. He has issued concillatory rhetoric to stop the divisive and discordant position we are in. As such he should be given the chance to bring the country together as I hope he can. I don’t see him given a very long leash by the American people. I also see that President elect Trump has a published agenda and stance along with a Republican legislature and a Supreme Court having the deciding majority to be appointed. I do not see the losing party capitulating in this and agreeing to compromise. This majority is ruled by the phrase “What i need is what I want.” To achieve any type of positive outcome to this election America must work together otherwise an outside force will compel that unity for our survival.
I already miss Obama’s jokes but here is the master – The Gipper
7:03 AM PST
What is it with this feeling of hopelessness, depression, melancholy and gloom that seems to permeate the essence here? I am going to go back and do the selfie video blog format today addressing that. Also I will finish and launch the crowdfunding campaign on Indiegogo and edit down to about 3-4 minute promo along with a 45 second promo.
11-7-16 7:30 AM PST
I just finished my Monday morning jog. Passing people sleeping in doorways, having looked at my bank account earlier, reading emails, seeing the dire posts on social media and dealing with so many people that have lost any hope and they profess to be atheist there is something untoward on the horizon. Here is my take on all the conspiracy theories.
I have things I need to do. I don’t have time to do this drivel blog. No one ever listen to my bullshit . People back in Texas think I’m some kind of kook now and just attribute it to all that damn marijuana I’m taking. I am a patient I’ve been a patient of medical marijuana for the past 19 months. I moved here from Texas because I can use it now to legally and effectively treat my ailments. I am not on any of those incompetent pharmaceuticals I would not say I’m cured but I am doing way better and off everything except vegetarian organic food, supplements and RSO (I will post these conspiracy theory posts on a different website as this is too out there ) ……….. More
About the conspiracy nut stuff. People back in Texas know my concern about chemtrails. I have never seen first hand in any of those planes, if they even exist. Photoshop and props can go a long way to “prove” existence. What I do know is I have witnessed 14 trails spread out over a clear Texas sky at 7 AM going north-south and then 14 deposited east-west. What is the significance? I have no clue only a theory. I do believe there is never any simple coincidence. There is always reason and logic in any madness. The problem is that a lot of times that logic is based in madness and no scientific basis.
My theory it is weather manipulation. The trails are deposited in this clear sky early in the morning, they spread out to then completely cover the sky by noon. This new cloud cover in the higher levels of the atmosphere, drift back to the front that has been building up thus creating this super storm that now causes more damage in the form of tornados, flooding and damage.
Texas is usually very dry, since global warming even more so and can use more rain. Then I hear the real conspiracy nuts talk bout chemtrails and the toxins and biologicals being deposited in the sky and we are getting set for this next world wide pandemic. Wow, that’s really out there. Is it true? I don’t know but if you look at it objectively, it could be true.
Am I just paranoid and delusional from the devil’s weed? I don’t think that is it. I do believe there is a segment in society that has as there purpose the elimination of 90% of the surface population and not through natural selection such as legitimate birth control but rather annihilation using nuclear war, financial collapse, disease and destruction. I have no proof as to when or how this 10% will carry this out. I have my theories.
I have no proof that there is 1% of the population that controls 9%. My theory is after 18 months and all the destruction the 1% will reappear with their 9% to mop up what’s left. 8 months ago Hilary Clinton thought she was in the 1% and thought she was going to get her agenda done. That is when her popularity waned and she was on track to lose the nomination. She let them put the leash back on and now she is their good little doggy, their bitch ready to carry out “The Agenda”.
My parents that both died at 92 and my aunt who succumbed at 93 all told me it is best to never discuss politics and religion in public. These subjects are way too polarizing but is the basis of philosophy. Why can’t we discuss differences and work out a solution to these problems?
The reason is even though the 1% realize the problem is we have too many people and not enough resources their solutions are both unethical and illogical. However, these solutions are already well trenched and it looks inevitable.
10-1-16 4:54 AM PDT
I woke up thinking do I have to go take a leak? Do I want to check my bank account? Do I need to let Lily out? (Again what do I need and what do I want?) Why I got up and wrote this is I had a cognition and wanted to record it. I did think it was important enough to record and not lose possibly going back to sleep. Anyways, here I am.
My thoughts were my pride had been hurt last Friday when I had to suffer the consequences of my actions. I kept defending my position I am right and they are wrong. No one wants to admit they could be wrong and maintain their self confidence? Is that what pride is?
I already told the story that I could be a major representative for cannabis and was in effect called a drunk and asked to leave a cannabis social club. The establishment is a dab bar whose mission is to allow their patrons to get as intoxicated as they wish there. I felt disrespected to be called a drunk when I had not consumed any alcohol for a week nor had taken a “hit” from anyone’s vaporizer. I was over medicated on cannabis oil ingested previously.
My last consumption of any alcohol was a half glass of wine a week ago. I am a medical marijuana patient, consuming a massive amount of THC and one of the side effects can be behavior. I cannot report objectively as to how I behaved that night or any night. This because I am the patient. The patient is not qualified nor should they be permitted to also be therapist/caregiver and consume that much THC without a properly trained and licensed caregiver. I don’t have one. I have a person that claims to be my caregiver. That is pathetic as it is documented with the Gresham Police. My inter-relational behavior in public can also be documented by contacting the Gresham, Oregon police and fire departments. Just ask the lieutenant.
It wasn’t a physical confrontation, it was I became more confident and therefore more assertive. My caregiver is a cannabis self-medicating schizophrenic/bipolar patient. She has been off traditional anti-psychotics the last 2 years. The prior 2 years she was there were 4 hospitalization/institutionalizations. She is unqualified to be a caregiver. If you want clarification ask about it in the comment section.
To still defend my actions and perspective, I firmly believe my position and actions were appropriate and correct. I was right and they were wrong. But they had the power and so I capitulated. What I am getting at is in order to function in society best practices dictate an MMJ patient being accompanied with someone who can assist them. In the case of driving, negotiation of contracts, any critical undertakings really it seems very important to have that objective eye of a non-intoxicated observer. The designated driver in the bar scene. Otherwise you’re a rec user.
What I see is I have been wrong in my actions. I haven’t been violent, although that could have easily have happened with Laura as why the police were called. What it is, is that I have appeared in public intoxicated on THC unaccompanied. I have been a drunk in public presenting myself as a rec user.
I am not a rule follower. I am not a rule breaker. I act like a lawyer and figure out a way to break the law legally. I am a trained “lawyer”, just not licensed to practice law here yet. Also if here is a problem I work on a solution to solve it. That is the basis of our ticketing kiosk/280E solution. I will probably always be this way of needing what I want and wanting what I need. I have also operated from the knowledge that money and power get you what you want.
What I was getting at was for society to work there have to be rules otherwise there would be anarchy and chaos. It would be difficult for a productive society to form without some system of rules and regulations. I will not defend my position in this blog again unless asked in a comment. I will however, explain the rationale for the theory. That would be the legal justification.
The alcohol trade have bouncers in bars to maintain a sense of “order”. Drunks are thrown out of bars. Do we need bouncers in cannabis social clubs for wasted rec users? When customers in a bar get too intoxicated they cut them off. An MMJ patient unaccompanied is a rec user. I believe there should be a policy that all MMJ patients should be accompanied in a social club. I also believe to maintain a pleasant and relaxed atmosphere in a social club probably best practices dictate a “bouncer” present in these clubs. Maybe not a bouncer but more of a concierge to see if everyone is having a good time. If someone is disrupting the scene I believe the establishment has the right to ask them to leave. I thought rules in a dab bar? WTF.
7:00 AM – I am finished with my post and now am tired as I have been awake since a little after 4 AM. I have to work now. I just realized that I have been working the last 3 hours formulating and writing, in fact I work 24/7. Everything is work in progress and not piecemeal now. I am eliminating this feeling of guilt for lack of production. So I have a job to do. I’m going back to bed and take a nap. I will proof it later.
8:40 AM – Laid down and rested, did not sleep. Took my blood pressure again when laid down and when got up. 132/92 and then 122/82. I have not taken any additional medication since midnight. I believe I will wean myself down and spread this out over 3 weeks with the medication I have left which is about 10 grams.
I met the new neighbors, actually just introduced myself to her. She seemed nice but a little bit stressed and not wanting to talk. So I excused myself quickly, apologized for disturbing them and offered assistance if they needed anything. I hadn’t accomplished all that I wanted to in that first introduction but probably what was appropriate. I have realized its not always about me and what I want. Any type of interaction whether it is business, social or intimate is all predicated on building rapport, finding a need and providing relief from that pain point. But people don’t always want the same thing as you want.
Everyone you meet is a suspect that they want your product, service, friendship or presence. That is not true. The key is recognizing that, accepting it and moving on to your next prospect that appreciates and wants your product, service, friendship or presence. The tagline for MJ FUSE is “We only work with the best, everyone else can have the rest.” It may sound arrogant but the concept is we help the companies that want to work with us.
11-1-16 12:04 AM PDT
I have been here in Oregon almost a year now. I know that because I had Thanksgiving dinner last year with Ashley the waitress. Read the blog you will get it.
10-29-16 1:09 AM PDT
I went out tonight and was over medicated but wanted to go out and socialize. I walked to the bus stop because I knew I probably could drive safely but shouldn’t drive. So I took the TriMet.
I am going to post on a vblog all my selfies from tonight. I really didn’t have a very well received interaction tonight at the NW Cannabis Club. I was perhaps over medicated but wanted to get out and relax. I was called a drunk and threatened being thrown out of the club for being an over medicated patient. My intention was that I am going to go to the grand opening of a competitor that wants me to promote them. I am not sure how much they want to be promoted but if I become the chief lobbyist for the cannabis industry, which I believe is what I was offered should probably be of value to someone. All the groups I belong to someone should be able to sign a personal service contract where I’ll promote their cause, product or service.
What I did was turn everyone off there as they were not interested in what I had to offer which is my services which really are myself, So I am willing to “pimp” myself out and “be your bitch” for a year promoting whatever. My daughter works for an advertising firm that could probably monetize it. I’m tired, I’m going to bed. I want to associate myself with people that find as much value in me as I believe I have in myself.
I went into the bar walking home from bus stop. Lot of drunk people. That would have been a great segment. I used to get hammered with alcohol and now cannabis put me where I don’t like the taste of it. First time I’m in there and its like I’m rehearsing but actually scouting location. I’m doing what I have to do to be successful. I’m doing it solo. I want a volunteer videographer to help launch Cannabis Reality.
10-27-16 10:15 AM PDT
There is so much I want to verbalize right now. I’d like to record it on video or write out everything here, but it is really so much drivel as far as I’m concerned. I’m just whining about no one understands or “gets” me. I do realize that I’m currently on some very heavy dose of THC (the equivalent of smoking about 80 joints a day with someone else.) but i believe I make sense. It seems logical to me. I do notice I am getting rather excitable with people when that don’t really get what I am saying. But that is the way of the world.
The Muslims don’t understand the Christians and Jews who don’t understand Muslims. The Republicans can’t stand Democrats who think that all the Republicans are uncaring, egotistical imbeciles. We seem to not be able to effectively express our ideas to our rivals let alone our friends and relatives.
There are always disagreements about what is right and what is wrong along with opinions. Am I right? I think I am right. Am I right all the time? I think I am until proven differently. That is a “difficulty” of mine in that I am open and willing to listen to others. Does it make me easily manipulated? Maybe, but I believe I am open to being closed and willing to listen.
The reason I thought about this subject at all is what happened yesterday. I recorded this on a vblog but haven’t uploaded. I didn’t want to put this story down in writing but here goes. I need (want) someone to proof this before I post it or anything at all is published but I don’t have an editor yet. I am DOING EVERYTHING by myself. I think this “business” can be hugely successful and do a lot of good. What I see is I haven’t been able to attract any support in the form of employees nor investor capital. This because they hear I am seeking volunteers instead of actual employees. Right now all my sales positions are commission only sales with no base salary. I tell applicants I can pay a salary but only if there is money in the bank and that comes from sales. So after the 7 extra lines here goes again:
Laura received here disability check yesterday. $454 deposited directly into her pseudo debit card bank account which is a prepaid debit card with MetaBank. MetaBank is an online bank out of Iowa. Laura is an untreated schizophrenic/bi-polar patient. She is also a “body” that ballooned up to 200 pounds on anti-psychotic medicines that BTW didn’t work. She is now self-prescribing cannabis for her condition. She is disabled and cannot or is unwilling to hold a job. I’m supporting her even though I am not under obligation to do that but she would be homeless without me.
She asked me to take her to a local dispensary in order to purchase her medicine. That is one of my problems with my treatment. I am the patient and have no real caretaker or therapist to oversee my treatment or that I am willing to allow to . I haven’t found anyone here that I feel comfortable with in their expertise. I have done most of my research about treatment from the internet as to regimen, dosage and modalities. Having almost 30 years formal education with 2/3 of it in science and technology, I can discern appropriate regimens.
Even though he had heart disease, I just realized that someone died in my office from an overdose of medication I administered, so maybe I’m not the best practitioner to treat my condition. I have been attempting to persuade Mary, the oncologist, to move up here to set up a MMJ cancer center to treat cancer patients with cannabis. She has practiced conventional medical oncology for almost 40 years. I told her this could be her legacy but it may not sink in until after she is gone. Part of my fantasy world is where she is the founder of the future NW Cannabis Medical Center.
My disagreement with Laura was I advised her to get a quarter ounce now and I could procure a half pound from a wholesaler I know for $300. Granted, that is shake or leaves versus $200 for an ounce of “buds” but is only $100 more for 8 times as much and I’d give her the $100. She bought the quarter.
That should be okay as it was her money to do as she wanted. I however, knew I was right about this as it is only logical and she was wrong. But was she wrong? We got back in the car and I asked her if she knew how many ounces were in a pound and then a half pound. After telling me she didn’t sign up for any math quiz she told me 8 ounces equal a half pound. So I invalidated her action and asked her how much a half pound would cost in there. Again, the math quiz response.
She also reminded me that when she first arrived here in Oregon I said I would get her the half pound then but didn’t because of a disagreement with another wholesaler as to price and quantity after the agreement had been made. That time I started buying her medicine in quarter ounce quantities at a higher price in a dispensary.
What I’m getting at is I knew I was right and she knew she was right. That is the problem all these diverse factions with the notion they are right and everyone else is wrong. She got back to the house, lit up her medicine and everything was fine. Hmm….. maybe Bob Dylan was right “Everyone must get stoned.”
10-20-16 10:11 AM PDT
I really don’t want to do this podcast/blog/vblog by myself. I am talking with a couple of friends that are thinking about retiring but don’t want to. Retire you die. Come up here to do this with me and give their expertise to reel me in and balance. Maybe only couple weeks. I need money and I need actual support. I can pay for support with money. Need and wants are the same thing for me now. So I need money and can get it from these friends of mine and I’ll give them more than what they are giving me in the way of excitement, entertainment and money. What I need is money along with business and relationship support. That will get me where I want to be. I don’t feel like going anywhere today. I need someone here to motivate me.
Talked with Brit and I think she gets what this is. Really, it is hard to fathom and believe and she will have to put in sweat equity, but this is like offering her a CEO position of a top 100 company. I do like her and hope she succeeds. She seems like she is pretty bright but also looks hot so she presents well to the public.
10-19-16 11:57 AM PDT
This is barely a Morning Thought as it is 3 minutes until afternoon. I did some recording to upload to the podcast/vblog this morning. I watched something I uploaded to YouTube on Monday and it is really depressing. I have got to change my attitude. I mean I don’t want to watch that depressing shit of this bald headed depresses SOB whine about how miserable his life is. And that is me but it’s not me! I don’t ac like that or do I? I will admit I am depressed. I didn’t want to get up this morning and I finally got up at 7:22 needing to get ready and leave for a meeting by 7:45 to get to downtown Portland by 8:30 so I went back to bed and got up to go jogging at 7:50. I didn’t get back to sleep even though I am exhausted. I laid there thinking I should go to the meeting because you missed it last week. Then I thought I need to buy tickets and thought I have money coming in, but I need to pay bills. I am so put out with worrying about money. I am doing ok as the last 2 days I did $2400 in sales and and done $200 today so far. I have enough to survive just not thrive which is what I want.
I filled up 12 capsules with RSO last night and went to take a dose at 2 AM when got up but couldn’t find them in refrigerator. I dug around in the trash and in the refrig but couldn’t find them. I thought Laura probably hid them since I didn’t get her medicine last night. I was pissed and asked her who told her she needed “medicine” since she is not a registered patient of MMJ and no one has recommended it. She is a Recreational User. She probably would be a patient but doesn’t have a card.
I am going to discontinue doing any of those video blog recording they are worth watching. Right now they are all the same depressing shit and I don’t want to watch them and I can’t think of anyone else wanting to watch. Maybe if I got some followers asking for more I would. I am starting to doubt whether the RSO is doing anything for the prostate cancer. That is a tall order to fill. I believe cannabis oil can be effective treating and killing cancer cells but is probably too early now. Maybe 10, 20 or 50 years from now. I feel that I am becoming symptomatic as I believe the prostate is enlarged from when first discovered. The PSA went down and I thought all right this is working, but haven’t had tested recently. Quite frankly I don’t want to get any bad news. Like if I don’t hear it it’s not true?
I am depressed and I know what to do to get out of it. I do have PTSD and it is subsequent to the 4 years I spent incarcerated and everything I lost. I was doing great until I broke my ankle 18 months ago. Coincidentally, I had started the cannabis treatment 2 months prior.
The breaking my ankle and the subsequent recovery I am not sure caused Laura and my separation. After she had to be my caregiver during that time we haven’t been the same. The effects were that she did not love me any longer. I guess she forgot about the sickness and health thing but actually we never exchanged vows and were simply common law married. That said we were legally divorced in 2000 and never remarried.
I am going to finish this later in Afternoon or Evening because it is 1:32 PM now.
10-18-16 1:42 AM PDT
I am so frustrated feeling underutilized all around. I was utilized before and was quite successful but now seems difficult to be taken seriously as to what I am marketing, what I am selling. I am not being successful selling. What do I need to do? Stop being needy. How do you stop being needy? Well first you have to stop the need to be needy.
How many times a day do we disparage our abilities and successes by listening to others or even worse telling ourselves what “we need to do”? I need to behave or do this to be successful. I need to do that to accomplish my goal. I keep saying to myself “I need to get more money in.” Well you look for whatever you can do and then you do whatever it takes to accomplish that which now you know you can.
Those are the principles of marketing and really any business whether the cannabis industry or the ticket business. Stop listening to people that tell you what you need to do and do what you know you have to do to accomplish that goal. But you may find that what you know you have to do to accomplish that goal is what you were told you need to do originally.
I was talking with several people and the topic of being needy came up. The despair of separation, the desire to reunite, that desperate feeling of hopelessness for something that has been taken away. Let me tell you those images do not paint a desirable picture. Needy is not attractive whether it is on a man or on a woman.
How Do You Stop Being Needy? You do what you want to do. I have learned now that to be happy I have to be successful and I have further I cannot be successful by myself alone. I do what I do best and I leave everything else to all the rest. That is what I do best and it is what I want to do.
10-17-16 9:29 AM PDT
I did some video bogs this morning so will not write a lot here. The video blog link for today is here. Problem is it is ALL Raw footage now and unedited so there will be some wading through. Somebody asked me last week if I were self-conscious doing a blog but particularly a reality television show or video blog. I thought I went through strip searches 3 times a day. Somebody criticizing me verbally for something I said or did, would I feel embarrassed about that or self-conscious about it? Maybe, but would it keep me from doing what I needed to do to succeed? Probably not.
My parents both passed away at age 92 along with my aunt who also died at that same age. They all told me with their wisdom “Don’t ever discuss politics or religion in public.” Those two subject have been the basis of most wars and arguments on this planet. It’s the easiest way to get someone upset with you is to disparage someone’s politics or religion. So what do I do? I make this blog and my video blog about my thoughts on religion and politics. If that’s not enough controversy I throw in sex, drugs, alcohol and cannabis to make this even more politically incorrect.
People tell me all the time “dude what you write is way too much inappropriate disclosure.” That is the way this blog/reality business works as it’s about exposure and people’s interest levels. Look at Kim Kardashian. After her sex tape was released she received all the negative blowback. However, that resulted in tremendous exposure and support which eventualized into her popularity and success. In advertising and marketing you pick your platform and you do what you need to do to make your campaign successful. Do I like it? Yea, but I’d rather be in bed sleeping.
10-16-16 8:20 AM PDT
It’s Sunday morning. Really I feel like staying in bed until noon sleeping. I also feel guilty because I’m not doing anything. WTF am I supposed to do, it’s Sunday. I’m going to my coffee meeting with the group of heathens this morning – the PDX Atheists Meetup Group. I joined and belong to a bunch of these meetup groups. I missed 2 or 3 last week as wanted to go but just didn’t. I am not going to take any med until get back even though feel kind of funky emotionally.
I feel kind of isolated here even though surrounded by people. I suppose it is depression. I guess I’m just bummed about my life circumstances. I think about where I’m at and all the things I’ve experienced and should be grateful but life is not where I want it now. I am not homeless. I have a job, I live with a woman and 2 dogs. I have a car and a social life as I went to the Ludacris concert last night and had a good time. The event was billed as “Boo Bomb” with Ludacris, Jagged Edge, En Vogue, Color Me Badd, Sugar Hill Gang & Young MC. I was in the 5th Row Center Floor, great seats and sat next to a pretty woman that I joked with. I just wasn’t satisfied with the evening.
Why would I be dissatisfied with that? I’m not earning enough money to support my lifestyle. Could I downsize? Yes. Do I want to? Fuck no, I have downsized so much and lost so much from where I was at, why should I give up more. My personal mantra which my grandfather told me years ago and I have said for years: “Nothing good is ever easy and nothing easy is ever good.” Entrepreneurship for me has never been easy, I have worked to be successful in the past and am working to be successful again. The successful entrepreneur is the one that doesn’t quit.
I would like this television series to take off. It will need followers and to get followers content. I guess I’m too boring to follow. I mean here is this old white guy in the 5th row of a Ludacris concert. Who wants to see him there interviewing hip hop performers?
I had a pair and another 4 pack of tickets. I pulled the 4 pack to use myself to record content. (I have to go get ready – will finish later under Afternoon Thoughts or Evening Thoughts if Cowboys game is broadcast.)
I expect this TV deal to work but can’t do it alone. Maybe if I could entertain like Obama does. I watched his speech at the White House Correspondents Dinner Speech. His speech writer was great but his delivery even better. Some people hate him and others love him but he has a following. Maybe this is unrealistic now but I would like to be in a position where I was well known as MJ Mike and our show was so popular we could have him on the show after he is out of office. Preferably he smokes a bowl with us. Would that get viewership? Most definitely. Is it going to happen? Probably not.
My plan last night was to go to the last night. Record the evening, edit the material and post as content. The people I went with said they have 1.7 million viewers on their podcast for Hip Hop Magazine and they had contacts with the groups performing. Did we do an interview? No. Did we record? Sort of on the iPhone, which mine died when Luda came on.
There is a policy at the Moda Center no recording audio or video equipment. Exceptions are for Press Media and representatives. I do have a Press Pass from Cannabis Reality, that looks sot of official. We are a media company and I am the Producer/Director/On Air Talent so should be official. The old adage “You fake it until you make it.”
I went jogging this morning and while jogging saw 2 young dudes and a chick and I thought they would be good interview subjects but I don’t have my phone/camera. I run home and get it and jog back. This is one of my first interviews and I’m still looped from medication last night/this morning so this may be used but probably not. I got their permission to record but not sure if I actually asked their age. Experience will help and maybe if had some help. Anyways, I’m not an interviewer but maybe I can learn to be one. Practice. The data results were that of 3 young people that smoked marijuana if someone came up to them on the street would they answer yes or no. All 3 said yes. This was in contrast to the small study (11) I performed a month ago in 2 dispensaries where 55% gave a false negative response. I believe my conclusions to that were posted on this blog earlier but will upload the unedited interview later to YouTube Here.
It is 11:24 AM now. I did the videos and will upload. I had meant to do a recording of me talking with Paypal. Actually, I wiil do a video talking with the Paypal employee Debit
I was going to make my next post for the Afternoon Thoughts but it is 8:02 AM now. So to solve that dilemma (yes, that is the correct spelling, look it up ) I will schedule the post for the afternoon? I am post 2 doses of medication last night. The doses fill a 500 mg capsule approximately 90% with the current batch of RSO I have been taking the last 2 months. It calculated out at about 57%/37% THC/CBD. with the last dose at about 3 AM. Normally I take 3-4 doses of that a day for treatment.
I am thinking the purpose of this particular segment of the blog will be about the effects of my treatment and the side effects. Along with that will be some of my thoughts that come up with I’ll put down also. This feels sort of cathartic so and I have an urge to purge it, so to speak.
Ok, so my dog I’m thinking is so stupid that she will not come in out of the rain and is just standing on the sidewalk getting wet. I’m standing in the doorway and my other neighbor walks by. Of course I have to stop him because I want to talk. It’s all about me you know but makes me happy. I don’t think I’m obnoxious as I will pick up on facial expressions and pause and say something like “I’m sorry, I have a tendency to just stark talking and ramble on about it. Is this of interest to you?” Surprisingly, most people will tell me oh yea and ask me to continue. I sometimes wonder if they are being completely honest or just being “Portland Nice”. Sometimes, I say and do things that I know are inappropriate disclosure, but I do it anyways because…. It is 8:24 now and I have to get to ticket business work – Coldplay tickets released this morning, general sale on Friday or Saturday. I’ll come back an finish under Afternoon and I’ll post this in Morning. Bye.
Actually, Coldplay goes on sale here at 10 AM but Houston at 9 AM. I could probably easily spend $20,000, maybe even $100K pull tickets for their upcoming tour but I am under capitalized and can only buy a pair on the floor in Houston. I pulled a pair on the 9th row floor and they cost me $518.15. I recheck 3 minutes later and the best I can pull are row are row 27 and 5 minutes later, nothing in the front sections of the floor. This is not rocket science, anyone can buy tickets. I like the feeling of buying good seats and that they will be available for someone to enjoy. I can but don’t always do make a sizable profit for my endeavors.
I am frustrated by this as I have the expertise and knowledge to do this ticket business successfully but don’t have the wherewithal to hire others to assist me nor really do it correctly. I’m listed as a large seller on Stubhub, but I wouldn’t consider that as I’m only generating about $21K a month in sales with the retail value of my inventory less than $65,000.
People, disparage the business as having negatives associated with it but it is legal. I like it well enough and enjoy doing it, particularly more than direct sales because there is really not much selling when I get the order. It is kind of like cannabis sales as people want what you have and come to you. However, there are always haters in anything, especially cannabis and concert tickets. Being a ticket broker is what I found I could do as the competition in the IT fields are so immense and I’m an old fart now compared to all the other network engineers. I can’t practice dentistry as I’m not licensed and so far removed probably couldn’t pass the test if I could take it. The stockbroker/investment banker gig would be to start over at entry level, so no.
So, if I could I would have a different career as my public image such as the ad agency for cannabis and be the reality TV star/personality character would be what I’d like. With that, let Jake or someone run the ticket business but as I have said the ONLY thing making me any living now is this ticket business. I was talking with someone that lives on less than $1600 a month social security and I’m having a hard time with $10,000. Of course I’m supporting the cannabis business which isn’t supporting me. I just paid $530 rent and $435 past due phone bill for the office I’m not using. I need to make sales and am not doing it as I hate it. I’m not above sales, but really burn out about pitching anything. What I would like to do is pitch the people that will pitch our products. Write on this blog, do the reality TV spots and be successful in the cannabis industry.
I’m going to look at tickets now and close this even though I do have more to say. I need more time and more money, I need some outside help. I am looking for a co-founder to compliment me in the business haven’t found anyone yet that I’m comfortable with or that they are as a partnership is like a marriage only different.
10-11-15 Tuesday morning 6:28 AM PDT
I was watching some politician last night, they ALL sound alike just different wording. This was one that was denying global warming existence. It’s like listening to a three year saying they didn’t wet their pants with them standing there in soiled clothing. I mean WTF, I moved from Texas and when I was growing up, and that was over 50 years ago, it never got to 110 degrees in the summer. That is warm and it is happening all over the planet. We are like infants left here. The inhabitants on earth are similar to your child that leaves his books out in the rain and get ruined. We are leaving our planet in all this crap in the form of pollutants and toxins. We can’t just go out and purchase a new earth like you can get another set of books, it’s a lot more critical.
We are in global warming. The polar ice cap is melting, sea levels are up along with carbon dioxide in the air. There are more severe storms now than 20 years ago. There is more extreme weather, the oceans are more acidic and temperatures are just hotter now everywhere, even Antarctica. Studies suggest consensus among scientists is as high as 97 percent that we are in a state of global warming now. Global warming DOES exist. It is very easy to fix global warming, environmental problems and greenhouse gases. Let’s just grow up and bring our books in. Come on Don, Mark and all you other deniers, change your diapers they stink. (Note: None on that list of global change deniers are from Oregon but 17 are from Texas.)
Went out last night to my group meeting of the atheists. Laura wouldn’t go, she has gotten Jesus and the bible, thinks I’m possessed by demons, alien robots whatever. So I believe in God but I also don’t think it is my responsibility to convince anyone else that he does exist. I hate writing. I am not a writer I am a story teller, not a great storyteller but I can get great storytellers to tell their stories. I get on this cannabis medicine and I have to tell my story and then tell it badly. Talking about tangent shit (oops should have put in crap) like talking to people about religion and God at this atheist prayer meeting. They know I don’t profess to be atheist nor agnostic. They ask me prove God exists – not my job, he exists for me and fuck that’s really all that counts in an existential world. Really I have concluded that God does not exist for me in this lifetime, and that is really, really sad. I mean I started crying right now thinking of that. Go get coffee and come back.
Well, I just went wiped my eyes and came back to write while fresh. I hate this writing as my thoughts race a lot faster than my fingers. Anyways, I was thinking as usual coming down off the heavy medication I took after coming home last night. Reflecting on my life, where I am at, at this age in life. Lot of my friends and relatives are retired or talking about it, of those people that are still speaking to me. I move 2000 miles to start a new business that has not done anything in an industry that is about to sky rocket. My ticket business is marginally successful, it would do great but mainly don’t have the capital. Got all these people want to raise or lend me money that is going to cost too much to do much good. Not that it costs too much – I don’t want to pay them to raise me money before delivery. You raise the money I’ll pay you, but the people that are willing to take it on the back end want 40-50%. That’s the kind of deal they did at Stratton Oakmontand JW Gant.
Anyways I’m stressed about money, business, personal life. I do not feel successful in life as at this age I expected to be a respected member of the community as some type of successful business man with a loving family and lots of friends and acquaintances. And I have worked for that with almost 30 years of formal education and had that idyllic life. Read up about me, what I had done before, what I had accomplished. Then it was all taken away and I am struggling, living with my ex and soon to be further ex-wife who hates me and wishes me dead. People ask me if I believe in God and I say yes I believe God exists he exists within and we all have to be godlike when others act to us as humans act towards God.
I mean fuck why should I help this bitch that hates me and only here hoping I will die off and she can lay claim to a $250K life policy. I mean she claims to be godlike and here to help me and that I asked her here. That was the biggest mistake. Laura has alienatated everyone else in her life and she trying to do that with her last friend – me. She stays in bed until about 4 PM just to get up and tell me how bad a person I am for not giving her $5000 a month. We were already divorced and this is not a community property state. So I am helping her out of the goodness of my heart. I believe in Karma. I probably would have been homeless if not for Mary helping me but I did save her $3 million by divorcing her and her being excluded from my problems. If Fat Fuck Frankie had gotten that $3 million he probably wouldn’t have come after me, only God knows – wait there is no god at least that’s what some people keep telling me.
Had to stop and go to what I thought was throw up. I took probably 1200 mg BSO last night and early this morning so heavy meds. So I go to this social meeting with group of atheists to socialize as my social life is in the shitter. I go to business meetings and I’m not being successful there. I haven’t actually seen anyone in my family living here IN PORTLAND since I moved here last November. And not for lack of trying. With that I do feel that I am on my own. I was excommunicated from my church and then sent to prison for doing the job I was trained for, just maybe not doing it the way I was trained. We all are responsible for our actions. Our rewards and punishments are directly related to what we do and say. For a lot of people what all they do is to say, with me included. (I thought that was profound so I came back and added emphasis here.) Most people never ever really DO anything all they ever do is TALK about what they can DO. I don’t really provide a product but rather a service and people pay for it if they like what I say. I do so many things and all seem to be floundering for now. I need capital. The most successful is the ticket brokerage and I ate $1000 this weekend which is terrible. I need that $1000. Is ticket brokerage this fantastic business where you hoard up tickets and then sell them for enormous profits, no but sometimes it is. Sort of like gambling and cannabis?
I mean I am not happy with the direction that my life has taken to this point. My health is not like it was when I was 30. I’m bitching about problems, everyone has problems and I was thinking in certain things I am in the 90th percentile or higher, so why am I complaining. There are things that I or anyone would like to have and I’m bitching because I don’t have them. Like Tony Montana said first you get the money, then the power and (politically corrected) the woman. I still think of what he said as pussy, not the changed politically corrected version of “woman” in the movie released now. Maybe I’m not politically correct myself, maybe I’m still not that old or that I don’t “act my age” as I still have a drive to succeed and procreate. I go to an atheist meeting and I say things like yea well we are on the devil’s planet so why would God exist here or that we are just stupid humans in the universal evolutionary time line and anyone that professes to be atheist are egotistical megalomaniacs attempting to erroneously hold that spot at the top of the chain. Give it up, we are the subject not the experimenters. I only had 2 beers but I guess mixed with the cannabis still in my system. I don’t think I put a really intelligent point of view out there as I had intended. All of it made complete sense to me – LOL. I am somewhat restrained as if I verbalized everything I thought out loud I would probably be locked up too. Still I am very guilty of inappropriate disclosure, look at this blog. – again LOL
Anyways, didn’t really click with anyone there. Right now I’m not getting the woman nor the pussy. LOL. Mary is 2000 miles away, Laura is crazy, the women I meet here are damaged, not interested in some old fart or they are in my same age and weight class and I’m not interested in them. The meeting last night was about 6 men to every woman and only 2 or 3 I was interested in. There were a couple drunk chicks that I started talking with outside and seemed receptive. I just didn’t want to put the energy out there to motivate them if I hadn’t already and I’m really tired of condom sex. I want
a companion that is my friend I can talk with. Haven’t found them here yet but I keep praying. It’s knowing to whom to pray to is the key For now on this planet God does not exist for anyone else but me because he is within us. God will exist for you within yourself and is not your place to make that real for anyone else. I will not profess to be an atheist in a godless world either.
I will probably get into trouble for using these pictures but these are women that contacted me to be friends on Match and Facebook.
I have to go take care of my dog, she is whining about something. The back door is open and it’s raining, of course it’s raining this is Portland. I like the rain here, it is not like the rain in Texas where the clouds get angry with the sky and create lightening and thunder. There is no lightening here, which is weird but something about electrical activity which has to do with positive and negative forces. Does God exist yes, does he exist here, I don’t know as there are a lot of professed atheists here so? I’m going to go and see if I can watch the Cowboys today they play the Bengals at 1:30. Funny, in Texas the Cowboys were gods and some of them thought they were also.
It is hilarious, Laura has hidden or lost all my remote controls so I can’t access the cable on the tv, the DVR or DVD. She thinks someone has come in and stolen them. So I called the cable company, after making sure I wasn’t so far behind on payment that they would handle customer service without asking for money. I hate this no money crap. Anyways, they say I can come get a new remote but the closest store 6 minutes away is closed on Sundays, the next is 21 minutes away but I can download remote app to my phone and they will send me the controller in 3-5 days by mail. I do that and the Cowboys are not playing here today on cable and the Game Pass with NFL only rebroadcasts, no live TV only live radio. That’s crap, why would anyone pay $99 for that? Are we having fun yet?
I probably need an editor as this just rambles – LOL
Trust, Ethics & Money
What does it take to abandon your ethics for money? Is it that the person and their family are hungry and they need some food to eat today? So they do whatever it takes to make sure they and their family can. On the surface that sounds good as the person is doing what is necessary to provide for their family’s well being. Or does it mean that the person is desperate because the new Lamborghinis are out and that executive wants one and he needs more money or he won’t be able to buy it – now that is desperate.
Seriously, many people confuse needs and wants. In Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs there is no mention of mansions, fancy sports cars, trips to the Bahamas or private jets. It is mentioned that physiological needs such as food, clothing, shelter are the most important with psychological and self-fulfillment needs not as critical.
Nice things are exactly that nice. I have lived where I had money and also where I had absolutely no money in my wallet and all my bank accounts overdrawn. I can say without wavering it is far better to have money.
What is it that makes people so desperate for money that they will abandon their ethics to get money but also hoard it once they have it? The second scenario can be the result of where people have gotten their money dishonestly to begin with. They are afraid someone else is going to come along and take the money they have now the same underhanded way they got it originally. Those that don’t trust usually can’t be trusted.
The main problem with Trust, Ethics & Money is the general opinion in society that all is fair in love, war and business. Along that same train of thought is that since politics is controlled by business and that money is the driving force in business, then it is expected to use politics to improve your business with money and the tool to accomplish it. There is a common perception, particularly in finance now, that whatever you can do to get ahead is actually a good thing as long as you win. Many adhere to Vince Lombardi’s adage that “Winning isn’t everything; it’s the only thing” there is even an annual conference Winning is Everything. But how desperate does someone have to be to abandon their ethics for money. I wrote an article about that right after I broke my ankle. Here is is.
I moved to Oregon from Texas last November. Recently, Gallup conducted a poll regarding adult usage of marijuana. I believe the resulting numbers are artificially skewed low at 13% for yes. I visited 2 dispensaries/rec stores yesterday doing market research posing as a customer. I purchased two 1 gram packages at each store. I conducted a small, quick survey myself of the people waiting to enter the sales areas. In the first there were 6 patrons waiting and I stated that recently Gallup conducted a poll regarding cannabis use. My question was “if someone approached you on the street with a clipboard and they said your answers will be completely anonymous but asked you if you smoked marijuana what would you say?” 4 of the 6 and 3 of the 5 in the other store said they would answer negatively. That was 55% would answer falsely. My basis for this assumption is that every one of these were customers there for the explicit purpose to buy cannabis. I don’t believe any of them appeared to be buying for their 5 year old epileptic child.
That was a very small study and because of that not statistically significant. The implications of this could be numerous. I know how marketing and advertising works. I have my own ideas about what these results mean but I believe the numbers are way low. 58% of the adult population support legalization. The American people don’t support something that they don’t personally believe in and use.
I think there are 2 possible answers to this. The first would be as I have stated above that these numbers are false and the results are erroneously low. The second and more ominous would be a deliberate attempt to publish low numbers. Everyone understands that cannabis is the fastest growing industry in the world now. I believe that the actual target market is closer to 50%, not 13%. If the market is in reality 4 times what it appears on the surface and your goal is to control that market once it is matured and seasoned, wouldn’t it make sense to ward off other competitors? Cannabis will become legal in 5-10 years and at that time there will be a cannabis aisle in every Costco or Walmart.
The cannabis industry is a huge industry right now, but will get even bigger. It is too disjointed and dominated by paranoia, maybe rightly so. Our competition is not amongst ourselves but rather outside. When I first started MJ Consulting some 20 year old called me a civilian. That was hilarious as I have been a patient for the last 18 months but I’ve been a fan since I was a teenager back in Texas. Last time I grew was while in college in the 70s.
The business would be a lot more profitable now if it weren’t for all the rules, regulations, taxes and fees that are absent in other industries. There are things that can be done now to make and keep more money. I asked an accountant here in Portland that handles the majority of cannabis businesses what he was doing about 280E. His answer was nothing just recommending to pay the taxes. Well it’s not his money. He had looked at our 280E solution putting in a secondary business into retail operations. I asked if he had any strategy and he said “no, I don’t want to raise any red flags and get an audit.” I asked if he thought all his clients would be audited because of the nature of the business and he responded affirmatively. I probably didn’t handle it correctly since I likened his “can’t do anything about it” attitude to what got 6 million Jews killed in the Holocaust. Maybe I overreacted comparing the elimination to 6 million human lives to having to pay exorbitant taxes, but I thought he is useless as a CPA. An accountant’s duty is to find ways to reduce taxes, research them and then give his recommendation. The business owners job is to decide to implement or not.
My ex-wife the physician told me she needed to find an new accountant as hers of many years was retiring. I asked her what type she was looking for. She said “I don’t want a daredevil, someone who will take questionable deductions and get me in an audit.” That is the mindset of most accountants. They believe all their clients are physicians, dentists and other conservative businessmen and women. That is not the case in cannabis. The entrepreneurs in cannabis are pioneers willing to take risks. They are working in an illegal industry that they have the potential of losing all their possessions and could end up going to jail for. They didn’t get in the business for a few pennies but rather more. As Vincente Sederberg, a cannabis attorney from Denver states on his homepage:
“Our clients are trailblazers, building a new and vibrant industry from scratch. Each and every one of them has made a conscious decision to assume a certain level of risk in order to change the course of history. As trailblazers ourselves, we take pride in being with them every step along the way, helping them navigate and overcome unique legal and regulatory challenges. We understand every aspect of the marijuana industry — even aspects that are not yet fully developed. Whether you are looking to enter the industry or invest in it, we can assist and guide you.”
Find attorneys, accountants, consultants, vendors and advisors that actually help you. There are way too many in the industry now just trying to make a quick buck. Everyone has their hand out wanting you to put money in it. I tell people if you advertise there are 2 important things to remember. First, your results should be quantifiable. Secondly, you should have a minimum ROI of 2 to 1. Our 280E solution is sold as a way to increase sales but can reduce taxes also. It is a 27 to 1 return. Our original tag line for MJ Consulting was “Making Cannabis Distribution Profitable” as that is the purpose .
I’ve been in advertising since I spun off Alphadontics in 1986 as a specialty advertising firm when I was a practicing periodontist. I believe it is what gave my daughter an early interest in the field. She now works as the creative director for a major traditional ad agency, having done a couple Super Bowl commercials.
Many of the current entrepreneurs in this industry are operating with a false sense of security. They say “We don’t need advertising, we’re too busy now”. I congratulate them for their success now but the landscape of the industry can and will change. We are seeking the visionaries in this field and not looking for those that will be flipping burgers in 5-10 years. We want the groups that understand business and want to be the Pizza Hut or Anheiser Busch of cannabis even though they are not there yet.
Cannabis advertising now consists of almost all branding or what I refer to as “Junk Advertising“. Advertising in cannabis is not the same as selling dish soap or Toyotas. The restrictive limitations are numerous, no television, radio, limited print and display ads. So many are turning to what they believe is their only alternative, “Specialty Advertising” This is a necessary part to building a brand and getting awareness. Currently it seems that the only real advertising is in social media.
I talk with cannabis business owners everyday and they all want a free consult which I’m willing to give. I will ask them what they are doing with social media. They will say Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and doing well. Myself, I thought I knew social media but it wasn’t until I hired professionals to do a consistent job that we started getting results. E Cigarettes had a similar dilemma as cannabis. The FCC banned radio and television adds. Twitter, Facebook and Instagram were off limits and the only thing was the new Google Plus. Our people were able to take e-Cigs from oblivion to a multi-billion dollar publicly traded company. We can do that for cannabis also. Our tagline now is “We Build Relationships and Provide Results.”
Went to a Meet up last night for All Things Cannabis!!! – Meet The Professionals. However not sure if that is not next Monday. There were about 10 vendors there few glass ware makers and the rest extraction processors or growers. The cost to join NW Cannabis Club – the last cannabis social club in Portland. http://www.nwcannabismarket.com cost is $20 for lifetime membership and $5 cover each time. I met a lot of people there with the main theme they were dabbing – vaporizing BHO or MJ Rosin. I still don’t like smoking and that was still harse to my lungs – I prefer to ingest. I was told no pictures because of privacy but I did take some iphone videos. I will go back next Monday and set up a table. Hopefully have someone else with me and could probably set up a camera behind me to record. People are still somewhat paranoid about cannabis even though is legal here in Oregon and also of outsiders. I believe this is the route to take to become known.
You will know you have attained your goal when you can do it effortlessly. “When you have learned to walk on the rice paper.” When you can walk without being seen by the motion detector. If you have to be undetected you won’t be. If you have to believe something is true then it won’t be. It has to be effortless to be true.
The Oregon Legalized Marijuana Initiative, Measure 91 is on the November 4, 2014 statewide ballot in Oregon as an initiated state statute. If approved by voters, the measure would legalize recreational marijuana for people ages 21 and older, allowing adults over this age to possess up to eight ounces of “dried” marijuana and up to four plants. Additionally, the measure would task the Oregon Liquor Control Commission with regulating sales of the drug. The initiative is being sponsored by the group “New Approach Oregon.” Anthony Johnson, the chief petitioner, hoped legislators would refer the measure to the ballot, however they failed to do so before the 2014 session ended on March 10, 2014. It is also known as the Control, Regulation, and Taxation of Marijuana and Industrial Hemp Act of 2014.